Always
by xStepOneIsYourHeartx
Summary: He fell in love with the boy at the rock show. Will it be Happily Ever After? (Short Stack Shandy fanfic Andy x Shaun) -smut warning-
1. Chapter 1

I pulled on my blink-182 shirt with a nervous breath.

I can't believe mum was letting me go to their concert alone, not that I had any friends anyway.

It was 8am when I walked out the door with my necessities, waiting for a bus.

Once on the bus, I listened to my iPod, listening to blink to pamper myself for the concert. I continued to do this on the train, too. I tried not to think too much, otherwise I probably would've smiled or screamed in excitement because I, Shaun Diviney, a boring 17 year old from the central coast was seeing the band that saved his life.

At each stop, I'd look at the people who walked on. Some were pretty typical looking, some were outrageous. Some were attractive, and some were just plain obnoxious.

But this guy caught my eye. It was a typical station, everything surrounding this station and carriage was typical, but he, he was different. He reminded me of me. He walked down the carriage, listening to his iPod, wearing a cooler, newer blink shirt than mine. He sat two seats in front, on the side facing me. He had shaggy blonde hair and blue eyes that I think if I stared at them for too long I would've died. I even felt sudden anxiety. He was so much cooler than me.

For those next three hours on the train, I tried to avoid him, but even as the carriage got more and more full, he stood out to me. I thought about going over and saying hello, many times, but he didn't even notice me when he got on. So what would be the point?

I'd get deep in thought, think about if blink meant as much to him as it does to me, if he's gone through what I've gone through. If he has replayed I Miss You on his iPod for days at a time. Was he everything I wanted in myself? Was he the guy I'd give my world to if I had the chance?

Answer was; probably

Once I had reached the station, I watched the guy I daydreamed of get up, as I did, he looked over at me, only a glance, it shot right through me. It was as if I was star struck. I wonder if he was too?

He walked in an opposite direction than me after we exited the station, I felt suddenly sad and was willing to follow him, but I didn't want to look like a stalker.

So I made my way to the venue, the way I knew how to, the streets full of people smiling, talking, rushing back to work from coffee breaks, cafés making fresh toasted sandwiches, making my stomach growl although I ate before I left, I brought one anyway.

By the time I reached the venue, there was a line almost wrapping around the venue...and I thought I had come early.

I walked down the line of teens, adults and kids, all looking similar to me, I felt like I finally belonged somewhere, which was weird for me. I saw that guy in the line, eating a pizza to himself. What a pig, I thought to myself. He did it so gracefully, though, which made me giggle a little.

I stayed quiet and to myself, sitting against the wall of the venue playing my gameboy. The concert wasn't starting for a few hours. It was going to be a long day.

My stomach jumped with excitement as security came out, telling us to get up and form a line and get our tickets ready. Which we did.

I passed in my tickets and walked through, a wide smile on my face as I saw the huge stage with the logo in the background, bright lights shining on it. I was so full of adventure and an envy, a need, for me to someday, be the one up on that stage. One day...

I squeezed my way through the mass of people pushing back and forth after the supports, looking up at the stage, the closer I got, the bigger it was. The guys all came out, my smile and excitement definitely couldn't be hidden now. Mark said hi to the crowd and they started playing Family Reunion, everybody went mental, i was getting pushed back and forth, I didn't know if I could handle it. But it was so great, going all out to their music, when I never got to do it at home.

The pit was pretty nuts, people got pulled out, crowd surfed, I still wasn't fully aware what was going on around me I was so ecstatic and every time they made their jokes about butt sex and having sex with their mums, I'd die, because I wasn't watching them play and make crude jokes on TV. It was real life, I could see tom's perfect face and then they'd sing and it was perfect.

A circle pit started to form around me when they played Dammit. Being so out of my own head, I didn't have the logic to run, I suddenly saw a hand, dimly lit between the bodies, I grabbed it and it jolted me through to the back of the crowd, taking me completely out of the mosh, I stumbled out and looked at the guy who pulled me out...

It was him...

The guy from the train.

Our eyes looked directly in each other as he was about my height, he smiled and grabbed my shoulder.

"You alright?!" He yelled over the music "you look like you were having a tough time"

I was speechless, I just nodded and laughed.

"How old are you?" He asked, muffled

"What?!" I screamed, he got closer to me, I swallowed the lump of anxiety in my throat

"How old are you?" He spoke into my ear

"Seventeen!"

"Oh cool! I'm eighteen. I noticed you on the train but wasn't sure if you were going to blink. What school do you go to?"

"Hunters!" I yelled, looking in his eyes. Even in the dark they were so blue.

"I go there too! I've never seen you before!"

I smiled wide "I only moved this year!"

"Well we should definitely hang out" he laughed "hey, what's your name?"

"Shaun" I smiled "what's yours?"

"Andrew, call me Andy though, I don't like Andrew, I feel like a 40 year old when people call me that"

I laughed and looked over at the stage. It actually looked cooler from back here.

"We're gonna play a slower song now." Tom began

"Feel free to sing along, or feel each other up. Whatever you feels right" mark added, me and Andy laughed, I looked at him and bit my lip. If this boy wasn't going to be my boyfriend. He definitely should be my best friend.

They started playing I Miss You, I smiled like crazy.

"This is my favourite!" Andy said with excitement to hear it live, as was I.

"Me too! Did you listen to it for weeks on end?"

"Weeks? Dude, months. It's my favourite"

"I love you" I jokingly said, he laughed and wrapped his arm around my shoulder, I got butterflies and leaned into him a little bit, singing along. His arm was on a bruise, I think, but I bared the pain.

It was weird. How he was holding me, leaning into me, he didn't let go of me most of the set. I even jumped up onto his back and screamed back the lyrics

"SHUT THE FUCK UP SHE SAID! IM GOING FUCKING DEAF YOURE ALWAYS TOO LOUD! EVERYTHING'S TOO LOUD!"

even though I was at the back of the room, I saw tom look at my direction and my eyes would tear a little, I was so gay. But I don't want to discuss my sexuality right now.

I got off Andy's back later and we tugged ourselves close by the waist, swaying and putting our other hands up to point and sing the chorus. And so we screamed.

"ILL NEVER ASK PERMISSION FROM YOU, FUCK OFF IM NOT LISTENING TO YOU! IM NOT COMING HOME, IM NEVER GOING TO GO BACK HOME!"

I never wanted to go home.


	2. Chapter 2

The show finished around 11pm. Me and Andy walked out of the venue, my ears were ringing so badly after we got our bags from the desk.

"Was this your first concert?" Andy asked me, hearing his voice was different to it screaming in my ear, I smiled. He had a nice voice.

"Yeah, you?"

"Unless you count bananas in pyjamas as a concert..."

I bursted into laughter and made my way with him down the street. We talked the whole way to the station, about who knew who at school, how I'd get along well with his step brother, who I think was named Bradie. Andy was an overall great guy and I was kind of overwhelmed. I went from having no friends to Andy fucking Clemmensen (we discussed our last names and where we were from. He's part Danish, which was kinda cool)

We sat together on the same train for the way home, three hours on a train, coated in sweat, looking and feeling like shit. Tired as hell. But he didn't seem to look as shit as me, which sucked, fuck him and his attractive looks.

There really wasn't much to say, since we were so tired, three hours on a train really brought all the hype down.

"Hey" Andy spoke randomly, I opened my eyes and looked at him, he smiled at me.

"Did you want me to walk you home? I missed my stop anyway"

"What!?" I sat up, not even realising I fell asleep, there were only three stops till my stop. I was freaking out.

"Dude, calm down. All I did was ask a question" he laughed, I looked at him, smiling. It was one of those things, where you see their face or they say something and you can't help but smile, then there's a part of you slapping yourself for it.

"Well you can stay over, I guess. Just because you want to walk me home doesn't mean I want you walking back to your house alone. I mean, it's 2am"

"That sounds good. I don't think I could walk from yours anyway, too far" he laughed with a slight giggle, I smiled at him, again. I felt like such a girl. I needed to snap out of it.

It was an hour walk back home due to the soreness of my muscles all over, I was lucky I had remembered the keys, and my Nokia didn't have one text from my mum or dad, oddly enough. I lead Andy through to my room then closed the door behind him, he went straight to my guitar, pointing to it

"You play?"

"Yeah"

Andy nodded in approval looked at my cd collection, smiling wide, also in approval, I suppose. He sat on my bed. My crazy imagination kinda wanted to get on top of him and kiss him, but no, that'd be ridiculous of me.

He ran his hands through his dirty blonde hair and bit his lip before chucking.

"You look like a douche standing there, we should get in bed"

"Dunno what douchier, me standing here or you just meeting a guy and asking him to get in bed with you" I smirked.

"I'm bisexual if that helps" Andy said, not even really responding to what I said. But I guess it made sense?

"I don't care" I laughed.

"You might"

"Well I don't. And I'm about to get changed in front of you" I spoke casually as I took my shirt and pants off, sliding boxer shorts and my daggy shirt on.

"Yeah, and if you weren't interested in me, you would've acted weird about me saying I'm bisexual. So conclusion, you're gay, or bisexual, too" he smirked. He thought he was so smart, I laughed.

"You're wrong. I believe sexuality is fluid." I sat next to him, he smelt like sweat, but the good kind.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I don't care what's in your pants. If I find you attractive and love your personality, then that's all that matters"

Andy just nodded, as if he had learned something new.

"We get deep in conversation at 3 in the morning" he giggled, I smiled and moved, getting under the covers, he just watched.

"We should sleep then" I suggested, Andy shook his head with a chuckle, as if me wanting to sleep was amusing to him.

He got in bed in only his underwear. I barely knew him, and he was only in his underwear

In my bed

And it felt comfortable, as if I had known him my whole life.

"You know. If I told you I wanted to kiss you when we hang out a month later from this moment, you'd think it was cute. But if I said it now, you'd think I was a creep"

I laughed and laid down next to him properly "you're lucky you're attractive and find you comfortable to be around, so no, I don't think you're a creep" I itched my lip awkwardly. I really wanted him to kiss me.

"No harm in a kiss, right?" I spoke softly, he smirked

"None at all"

"Good. Now kiss me" I grinned before I felt his fingers under the covers, grabbing a hold on my hip, giving me butterflies as his face inched closer and closer till our lips lightly touched, I breathed as we kissed softly, so slowly, so longing my heart was pumping blood straight to my cheeks to make me blush, my hands trailed to his soft chest as we continued to kiss, until he pulled away, his head rested against mine. I couldn't help but giggle, that was the best kiss, I had never experienced a kiss that felt that good. Andy was still a stranger to me, and I let him kiss me.

"Do you wanna cuddle?" He breathed against my lips, I nodded and turned my lamp off, snuggling into his chest with a sigh.

"I promise..." He said softly as he began to drift "I'm not going anywhere in the morning...I like it here"

Too bad I was almost fully asleep and couldn't respond.


	3. Chapter 3

I woke up, Andy laying next to me, which was weird for me. Waking up next to the guy you're crushing on, it's like, he stuck around a night, he'll stick around forever. My clock said it was 3pm. I chose to ignore it and sat up, my muscles burning in pain. So I laid back down, despite the growling in my stomach. Mum will come in soon and see if I'm up anyway.

Oh my god, mum.

How do I explain Andy in my bed in only his underwear? I mean, I never really came out to my family, I shouldn't have to. I like who I like, why should it matter to them who I bring home? Or the gender of them, for that matter.

I looked over at Andy and smiled, the past 2 days have been the craziest of my life. I just wondered if what happened last night will occur again, or will we act like it never happened?

Three knocks were at my door and made my heart jump, panicked as mum opened the door.

"Mum!"

"Oh, you're finally awake" she spoke with disapproval, I looked over anxiously at Andy.

"Who's your friend?" She asked

"His name is A-Andy, he's a friend from school"

"Well alright, as long as his parents know he's here"

Shit!

"Yeah, I'll make sure"

"Good, we're going down to dad's work for a while then going fishing, wanna come?"

"Nah" I shrugged "I'm pretty sore from the concert" I pouted

"Aw" she pouted with me and came in, kissing my forehead "well there's food in the kitchen, make Andy feel at home, we'll be home later"

"Okay"

She smiled and made her way out "love you"

"Love you too mum" I laughed

Then she left

I grabbed Andy's shoulder, shaking him.

"Andy!"

He groaned "what?"

"You gotta get up"

"What? I told you I wasn't leaving" he spoke groggily, I bit my lip.

"Come on...you're a stranger, I let you sleep in my bed and kiss me. There's gotta be a limit on how long I get to keep you"

He groaned and sat up, rubbing his eyes

"What am I to you? A hooker?"

I know he was joking, but I wasn't.

"No...it's past midday, wouldn't your parents be worried?"

"I'm an adult now, they don't care as long as I'm home within 24 hours"

"Okay" I scratched my lip awkwardly, he decided to get up and put his clothes back on. He had a wonderful body.

"Hey-" I began as he spoke at the same time

"What should we do about us?" He asked over what I said, which was the same question, we laughed slightly and shrugged, Andy smirked.

"Maybe we can just be a thing...nothing too serious, we'll date, like couples do, and if we're really interested, we'll actually get together" Andy seemed nervous at the subject, I smiled dorkishly, the things he made me feel.

"I'd love to date you" I spoke honestly, he smiled

"Sounds good. How about every Saturday night we have a date night?" He asked, I nodded.

"Perfect"

Later when I got up too, we sat on the couch and watched TV whilst eating cereal, besides the fact it was 4 in the afternoon. It was weird because besides our kiss and snuggle we haven't been romantic, we're just chilling out as if we're best friends. Which I think we were now.

"Hey Andy?" I asked curiously as the question popped into my head

"Yeah?"

"Are you a virgin?" I asked, he laughed loudly. What? I just wanted to know if I had competition.

"Yeah, guess so"

"Guess so?" I raised an eyebrow

"Just after I turned 16, I told everyone I had sex because they all bugged me about being a virgin. I mean, it's not easy trying to lose it when you barely know any gay males...I'm not interested in girls bits right now"

"So you are a virgin?"

"Yeah" he chuckled, his cheeks flushed "it'll be embarrassing if you're not"

"Oh no no! I am, I am" I laughed, putting my bowl down "I'm barely fuckable"

"Hm" Andy looked me up and down with a smirk "I say different"

"Oh fuck off!" I laughed, slapping his arm gently. Not that I didn't want to slap harder, but more that my muscles were aching.

Andy went home not soon after 5, giving me his number. He wants to get to know me, so he wants to call me every night to see how I am and talk about bullshit. I'm terrible on the phone, but I really liked him, and the fact that he makes an effort, god, it already makes me feel like a king.

And it was just after dinner he called the home phone. Dad answered the phone with a gentle "hello?" And the rest followed.

"It's for you Shaun"

I got up, almost skipping to the phone, Luke, my brother raised his eyebrow at me, he knew I had no friends. I spent majority of my lunch times in the music room or library.

"Hello?" I spoke as I held the phone to my ear, going to my room.

"Hey" Andy replied, he sounded different on the phone, kinda hot, I smiled.

"How are you?" I asked

"I'm good how are you?"

"I'm fantastic how are you"

My cheeks flushed and there was silence on the other line until there was an outburst of laughter.

"You already asked that!"

I giggled slightly, trying not to make more of a fool of myself "apologies"

"Apology accepted" he laughed

We talked on the phone for ages, he told me about his background, how he has a lot of siblings and how difficult it is having two families, which was odd for me because I had an average family, a mum, a dad and two brothers. But here he was, one mum, two dads, many sisters and only few brothers. His family was huge, I never would've guessed.

"Hey Shaun?"

"Hm?" I responded, stopping the little scribble of nothing I was doing on my desk.

"Tell me all the bands you listen to"

"I can't do that. There's too many!" I laughed

"Stand in front of your cd collection and tell me a few"

"Okay fine" I said, getting up and looking at them.

"Green Day, Blink, Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, The Killers, Panic! At The Disco uhm...-"

"I think I'm in love with you" Andy spoke seriously

I laughed and fell onto my bed "bit early for that, don't you think?"

"That's why I'm going to keep saying that I think I'm in love with you...and I'll keep saying it till I know I'm in love with you"

I felt the widest smile on my face, it may have been cheesy, but he was the sweetest.

"But you barely know me"

"Well, the more I know, the more I like you and I'm glad I ran into you, Shaun"

I huffed, biting my lip "you're ridiculous"

We sat up till 11:30, where dad came in and reminded me of the time. We were on the phone for 4 hours, it was insane.

I barely slept, I couldn't, my brain was too focused on him, my stomach would explode just by the thought of him in front on me. This was so ridiculous, I barely knew him!


	4. Chapter 4

I was so nervous for school, seeing Andy. He was just a goofy blonde weirdo and I just wanted to cuddle him forever. Ugh why do I fall so fast?

I walked through the school hoping I'd see him, but there was so many students, I'd never find him. It saddened me.

But there he was, standing at my locker, I smiled shyly as I walked over to him, he had the biggest grin on his face, I felt so many nerves in my body.

"Hey"

"Hey" I chuckled, putting my bag in the locker.

"I hope you'll be listening to First Date this Saturday, because it'll describe how I'll feel"

"Oh shut up" I laughed, as did Andy. I looked him up and down. How the hell did he make uniform look good. I grabbed the books I needed then Andy sighed.

"Sucks I'm not your age...I'd rather spend the day with you in your class. So over year 12"

"Hey, I'll be spending every snack and lunch time with you"

"You better" he pouted slightly, I smiled

"Don't you have friends?"

"Not many worthy of my time" he laughed slightly, I huffed a slight laugh before I heard the home room bell ring. The mood between us instantly dropped as we went our own ways.

I swear that was the slowest math class I was ever going to go through, the only thing keeping me on the edge of my seat was that in 10 minutes I was going to be able to spend time with Andy. My mind focused on him too much, during the past hour my brain kept thinking of questions I wanted to ask but I'm terrified of him asking me personal questions, he may leave if he found out how fucked up I really was. In my head anyway.

"Hey Shaun!" Scott called out whilst the teacher faced the board, throwing a paper ball at my head from across the room, I just glared at him. He does this to me every class and it's so irritating.

I picked up the paper and opened it. Classic, a drawing of a penis, so humorous.

"Ha ha very funny" I sarcastically replied

"Just thought I'd give you your lunch" he smiled cheekishly

"Well sorry I'm trying to cut back on paper dicks, they made me gain weight like crazy"

He huffed "you're so lame"

I rolled my eyes and packed my stuff up knowing it wasn't long now. A few minutes at least. I never understood why Scott was cool with his freckles and his hair that had way too much gel in it. But he never mattered to me. None of the guys and girls who teased me mattered, of course it hurt, but they couldn't get worse than this, so I tried to look at the bright side of things.

Andy

My mind instantly shouted when the bell rang, I got up and walked out of that class the fastest I ever had.

Andy was at my locker, causing me to grin as I made my way over to him.

"You waited for me?"

"Of course, here" Andy smiled, grabbing my books off me so I could unlock my locker.

"Well hey, nice to know you were drawing my penis in class" he smirked, I looked at him to see he was holding up the paper Scott threw at me. I sighed and grabbed my stuff, shoving it in my locker.

"What? Did I say something wrong?"

"No! No...it's just, Scott, from my class, he throws a paper ball at me and it always contains something vulgar because I'm a "fag""

"Oh" Andy looked down "he shouldn't do that"

I shrugged

"I'm used to it"

We mainly talked about the concert and if it wasn't about that, it was Blink I'm general. I felt kinda bad, because I know he wanted to know me, but I was terrified, but I wasn't terrified of knowing him.

This taller, dorky looking guy with braces came over to our table and nudged Andy.

"Andy, do you have any money? I want to buy a drink"

Andy looked at him, as did I, obviously he was Bradie, I could just tell because he was exactly how Andy described.

"Mum gave you ten bucks this morning, where did it go?" I never heard him sound so stern before. He sounded like my big brother

"I spent some on Rox, she wanted a chicken burger"

"Mums going to be so mad" he chuckled "no, I don't have any money"

"Ugh" he went to walk away then Andy pulled him back, smiling at me.

"Bradie, I'd like you to meet Shaun"

"Hey" he smiled at me, I smiled back

"Hey"

"He's in the same year level as you, so if you see him, be nice okay?"

"Of course, he's welcome to chill with me any time. See you around!" He smiled before he quickly walked off, he was kind of awkward. Perfect friend match for me.

"Sorry he's so weird" Andy laughed, biting his lip

"Nah, it's fine. I'm weird too" I laughed, he looked deep in my eyes and my heart fluttered, causing my eyes to look down. I still wanted him so bad.


	5. Chapter 5

DATE ONE:

Saturday quickly approached and I was panicking. Black or yellow shirt? Blue or black jeans? Who knew dating actually felt this nerve-racking.

About a second after I chose blue jeans and black shirt and got them on, the doorbell rang. I shat myself.

"ILL GET IT" I called out, running fast down the hall to the front door, opening it with a wide smile, it was Andy.

"You look...ready" he chuckled

"I'm sorry, I got worked up on what to wear, let me get my shoes and jacket and then we'll go" I smiled, my mum peeked around the corner as I started walking back to my room, I giggled. Good luck Andy.

"Hello Andy! Nice to see you conscious" she laughed as I ran out ready to go. Andy smiled awkwardly, I think he was anxious to meet my parents. "It's nice to meet you"

"Come in, don't stand outside in the cold!"

"No mum it's fine" I interrupted "we're leaving now, I might come home late depending on what we're doing" I said, kissing her cheek quickly

"Do you have your phone?" She asked as I quickly went to Andy.

"Yeah, I'll call you" I smiled at her

"Okay, you boys have a nice time"

"We will!" We both said as I closed the door. Andy laughed as we started walking to the bus stop together.

"What?"

"You're cute"

I smiled and looked at my feet, he slowly slid his hand down the inside of my arm, entwining our fingers. Nervously, I kind of yanked him, causing him to laugh. "You alright there?"

I felt myself blush, I looked at him "shut up"

He smirked before asking "did you listen to first date?"

"I always listen to first date" I replied, sitting with him at the bus stop.

"That's not the point"

I looked at him

"The point is that-besides the picking you up in my car-everything about the song is true"

I smiled at him "well don't worry, I'll make sure to check all the boxes"

"Do you like my stupid hair?" He sung, bumping me

"Would you guess that I didn't know what to wear?" I sung back, he chuckled

"Yes, actually"

"Oh you cheeky fuck" I laughed, as did he.

We went to the movies and saw Mean Girls and I honestly haven't laughed that hard at a movie at so long, we also had an almost-kiss moment, but I stupidly rested my head against his shoulder instead.

"Dinners on me" Andy told me as if I didn't have a choice as we made our way into Dominoes.

"And why is it on you?" I asked, he grinned

"Because I work here" he smiled, leading me through to the back.

"Hey Andrew" an older Tanned guy said with a smile, they high fived hello.

"Hey Dennis, this is Shaun. I'm just making us a pizza. You don't mind do you?" He asked, I was suddenly shocked. He could do that?

"Hey" Dennis smiled at me, I nodded "and yeah it's fine as long as you let Angie know"

"Cool as" he smiled, putting on an apron and hat. I giggled, walking to his side.

"Dominoes, huh?"

He put gloves on and gave me a sassy look, I couldn't help but smile.

"What do you want on your pizza?"

"Don't really mind" I shrugged

He nodded and started making a pizza, he was pretty good with how generous he was with the toppings, then again he was probably just generous because it was our pizza.

He sat out on a picnic bench not far from his work, the sky was getting darker by the second as we ate the pizza and damn, it may have been the greatest pizza I ever had.

"So" Andy swallowed "do you have a job?"

"Nope. I suck" I laughed, taking a bite. My mouth watered.

"How?"

"I'm an ignorant bastard and make people pay what I think something costs" I smirked, Andy laughed.

"What was your job?"

"I worked at a café and when someone would ask for a sandwich or something I'd give it to them for like, 2 bucks instead of 4...probably put them out of business though" I laughed, Andy chuckled.

"You're so..."

"So what?" I but my lip

"Refreshing, I don't know. It's like, everyone in my life is so...the same and then there's you, who shines brighter than anyone in the room" he smiled, looking in my eyes, I got butterflies and honestly felt like I could cry.

"I think I'm in love with you" I spoke softly, I said it instead for once, he smiled wide, he knew my intention, it was the same as his. To say 'I think' until it's 'i know'. Which I was positive that I knew.

He took me home not long after we finished the pizza. We reached my door and I felt sad, because Andy was going to go home.

"I really did have a great night, thank you" I turned to him, he smiled wide

"I'm glad, I had a good night too"

"Did you want to stay the night?" I asked, biting my lip. He shook his head

"Shouldn't. Only whores stay the night on the first date" he smirked, I laughed.

"You slept half naked in my bed the first day we met"

"Shut up" he chuckled, placing his hands on my jaw as he leaned in, my heart whirled as we kissed, soft and slow at first, I grabbed onto his shirt as we kissed deeply, before he slowly pulled away with a smile.

"I'll call you later" he spoke softly

"You better" I replied

He winked at me, walking away, I walked inside and went to my room, literally screaming into my pillow. He made me so happy.


	6. Chapter 6

DATE 4:

I can't stop it

I am falling too, too fast.

We've been dating for four weeks, we're not official and I want to be but four weeks isn't enough time. I'm going to his place to stay the night. I'm really nervous, because 1. I have to meet his mum and step-dad, then his siblings and try and not be awkward in their house 2. Because Andy might take things to the next level and 3. ANDY!

Oh god, I can't get him out if my head.

"Shaun, you ready?" Dad knocked on my door, asking. He was taking me because it was on the way to work. I walked out to him and smiled "ready"

"This one" I pointed as dad pulled up

"I can't even remember the last time you stayed over at a mates" dad chuckled

"Shut up dad" I rolled my eyes, getting out of the car "pick me up tomorrow after lunch?"

"I'll be here around 2:30. Be ready!"

I nodded "I will. See you" I closed the door, making my way up the drive way, a cute tabby cat sat at the front door and instantly approached me, running itself around and in-between my legs, I smiled and patted it quickly after knocking on the door.

"I've got it!" I heard Andy call out, I smirked, i don't know, it humoured me.

He opened the door with a big smile.

"Shaun!"

I hugged him straight away, the cat ran in straight away, Andy laughed.

"So you've met Knuckles I see"

"Yeah! He's cute"

"He's a shit" he laughed.

He introduced me to his siblings and just went "that's Bradie, you know him" when he reached Bradie, who was playing play station.

He lead me to their kitchen where his mum sat at the counter reading a magazine, I bit my lip. She looked like Andy, but more feminine. Clearly.

"Hey mum, this is Shaun"

She smiled wide at me, taking her glasses off.

"Oh hello! You look young, how old are you?"

"17" I laughed

"Aw, almost the same age as Bradie! Andy, you cougar" she laughed, Andy shook his head

"Mum!" He whinged

"I know, I know. I'm getting fish and chips for dinner tonight, is that okay?"

"Yeah" Andy replied

"Wasn't talking to you, I was talking to Shaun" she said, nodding her head toward me

"Oh well yeah, that's fine" I smiled

"You see how she treats me!" Andy joked to me, I laughed.

"Come on, I'll introduce you to Gerald."

Gerald was exactly like Bradie, all smiles, but witty. We didn't talk long though because he was busy working on something on a computer.

I walked into Andy's room and it looked so clean it made me raise an eyebrow. This is so not Andy. He cleaned for me.

"You cleaned" I smirked, he looked back at me before he picked up a cd.

"How'd you guess?"

"I don't know, just figured, because you aren't a clean guy"

He shook his head with a laugh and passed me the cd that said 'Shaun's mixtape' I felt instantly flattered and smiled at him.

"What's this for?"

"Our one month...I know we aren't official, but I wanted to make you this"

I smiled wide and slammed my lips to his, he giggled, wrapping his arms around my neck to kiss me back.

"I think I'm in love with you" I whispered

"I think I'm in love with you, too" he replied, taking the cd off me "want to listen to it whilst we chill?

"Sure"

We sat on his bed and with each track, I felt like it was him singing to me. Because these songs meant what he thought, or these songs remind him of me and it just got me real good. There was so many amazing songs on it from Chasing Cars, Fix You to of course, First Date. But then Rock Show played, and it hit me. I fell in love with the (boy) at the Rock Show.

"I really love it Andy" I smiled at him, as did he.

"I'm glad, really, I wanted you to know what I felt but I suck at words so I decided this instead."

"Well thank you" I smiled, leaning over him to kiss him softly, his hands ran up the back of my shirt, tingling my skin. His fingers combed through my dark brown hair as I tried to pull away. He pulled me down, making me giggle, I was laying on top of him, our lips motioning together slow and passionate, my leg was between his legs and I can tell you that for a fact I could feel him twitch under me.

Andy breathed deeply, rolling me onto my back as our tongues began to touch softly, I ran my hands up his shirt, his breath shook as our tongues deeply battled, it was actually so hot, I was so turned on and had so many butterflies. A soft groan left my throat and Andy smirked, pulling away, I looked up at him so lustfully before his lips touched my neck. And my god, the way his lips touched my neck-there were no words.

(I think) I'm in love with him.

And a knock at the door, he got off me right away, I sat up, pushing down my hard on. Fucking Andy...make out with me some more

"Yeah?" Andy responded, clearing his throat

"Dinners ready!" One of his sisters said. I couldn't remember their names, there were a few.

Everyone went to bed at around 10, but Andy wanted to play the play station after hours of waiting for Bradie to finish. Honestly, I just wanted to make out with him.

We played Crash Bandicoot in utter silence and concentration, whilst munching on popcorn.

"So, what do you think of my family?" Andy asked after a while, I shrugged.

"I don't know, they're all busy and loud, but I expect that from a family this big"

"Yeah, I guess" he pressed pause and looked at me "I so desperately want to get away though. Like, i have no privacy and have to clean and do things that aren't even my job to do. I'm so stressed out, I want my own place, or share a place with-" he paused for a second "someone and just live happily. I mean, I love my family but I can't deal with this shit 24/7"

"Yeah, I know how it feels"

"Like I swear I could just run away one day and they'd never notice" he spoke as if he didn't know he was talking aloud, pressing play on the remote.

"That's why I look forward to Christmas Eve" Andy continued "every year I go to my dad's house for Christmas Eve where we have a celebration, it's a Danish thing, but it's really fun and more relaxed and I get to see family I don't see that often, you should totally come with me this year..I-I mean, if we're together" I saw him blush, I smiled and kissed cheeks.

"I think so, and i happily will join you for Christmas Eve"

We got in bed and not even after being snuggled up for a minute, we were kissing, so delicately, not so it was hot and heavy but more of a cute, I think I'm in love with you, sort of way, you know? He made me so crazy and I enjoyed the ride.


	7. Chapter 7

I've slowly started opening up to Andy, very slowly and I concentrate on his face when he hears about my past with bullying and why I moved to Hunters. I haven't told him what I did to myself or how bad it used to be, but I'm getting there and so far, he seems to understand. He told me that he was picked on badly in year 7-9 for being short, but when everyone grew up, they let him be and once he said he lost his virginity (when he didn't) he was congratulated and everyone thought he was an awesome guy. He admitted that it sickened him and that the only person he could ever enjoy being with in this school is me, it always comes back to me and it makes me go crazy, in a good way.

Bradie and I have also gotten closer and talk more, we don't have much in common and we complain about things like we're brothers but we still have fun. He's that friend that likes every TV show and game you do. He's my nerd pal, I guess you could say.

Me and Andy are still dating, it's been six weeks. One and a half months and my love for him has never faded. We made our way to the garden in the front of the school where we sat on a log. Realistically, no students were allowed here. So we broke the rules, being as rebellious as we are and all...

Andy ripped the crust off his sandwich, throwing the crust to the crows that were hungry for food. Something was bothering him. I just had to ask.

"Are you alright?" I asked, he looked at me and nodded.

"Yeah, just my grandma, she means a lot to me and she had a fall and she's fine but I get worried, she's a very brittle woman" he frowned slightly, picking at his sandwich, I wrapped my arms around him.

"That has to suck really bad...I remember losing my grandad to dementia, by the end of a year he didn't even know I existed" I tried to comfort him, I never knew how, but he leaned into me, wrapping his sandwich back up.

"Yeah, it does suck. It's more that mum and Gerald are figuring out a plan for when she passes and what we'll do with her till then and it's sad...like, it makes you think about your funeral and what you might want, because no child should have to plan it for them...we all end up in the same place in the end"

"Yeah..."

He sighed and kissed my forehead. I didn't know what to say when he started talking about death and funerals.

We fell onto my bed, giggling as our fingers traced each other's flaws and curves, kissing so tenderly my heart was going insane, Andy sucked lightly on my lips which actually turned me on and then kissed my neck before snuggling into me, sighing.

"You smell good"

"You smell nice too" I giggled, running my fingers through his hair. He rolled onto his back next to me, grabbing my hand and looking at it, playing with my fingers.

"You have really nice hands"

"Bull. They look like they've been showed up a cows ass"

Andy laughed and looked at me funny

"You are so..."

"What?" I said with an uncontrollable grin

He kissed me quickly before standing up

"This Saturday, I wanna take you into the city"

I sat up and laughed

"Why?"

"Aren't you bored of sitting in my lounge playing video games?"

"Yeah, but I never get sick of kissing you" I honestly said, standing up, he grabbed my hands, resting his head against mine.

"You are the greatest"

I felt myself flush and cuddled him, my head against his shoulder.

"Nah"

"I think I'm in love with you" Andy whispered, I hugged him tighter

"But I have to go home" he spoke sadder, pulling me off him.

I stared at him and wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing him deeply.

"I miss you"

"I miss you too"

He pecked me once more and slid out of my grip and out the door he went.

I frowned and sat on my bed. Better get started on that homework for the exams.

I sat at the dinner table where we all would discuss what we did with our day as we ate. They didn't know me and Andy were dating, like his parents knew. I kinda want them to just figure it out but my family is literally so caught up in their own shit they barely notice if I leave. Maybe I should tell them all now, it'd be perfect, imagine the looks on their faces

"Jack got detention and it was literally the funniest thing-"

Here we go

I felt the words edge up the back of my throat

"Shaun, anything you'd like to discuss?"

I stared at every pair of eyes looking at me before I put down my knife and fork.

"I'm dating Andy" I calmly spoke, having a sip of my coke.

Mum and dad had a blank expression, Liam seemed confused and Luke laughed a bit

"Wait, so you've taken it up the ass?"

"Luke!" Mum scolded, I went red with embarrassment

"No! Dude. Virgin." I laughed

"How long?" Dad asked, his eyes were as confused as Liam's. Liam was exactly like dad anyway.

"A month and a half..."

"Why wouldn't you tell us?" Mum butted in, I shrugged

"Didn't feel the need to. Don't feel the need to come out about my sexuality either. I believe I can fall for whatever I want and should be able to bring home whoever I want in total privacy. No matter the gender."

They all nodded and continued eating.

"Wait, so every Saturday...you weren't just hanging out, those were dates?" Liam asked, I laughed at my dorky little brother.

"Yeah. Exactly."

The rest of the night they didn't ask any questions and accepted it and they know me, if they argued with me they know they'd never hear the end of it.


	8. Chapter 8

DATE 6:

Andy and I went into Sydney, the day was beautiful and warm, a perfect November day.

We went looking through the shops in the strips and I got a few new clothing items that Andy said looked good on me. We also brought matching sunnies.

We stopped by a cafe and got fancy focaccia's and chocolate peppermint fraps and made our way to a grassy, sunny area in a park. It was pretty peaceful, but we were also shoving our faces with delicious, expensive food.

"Hey?" I wondered, looking over at Andy, just laying down, soaking in the rays, wearing our new sunnies. He was beautiful.

"Mmm?"

"Do you think we'll last?" I asked, drinking my drink nervously, he looked at me with a bright smile.

"I hope so. I know my intentions" he smirked, I chuckled

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"Dunno" he shrugged "we'll see"

"Right" I smirked, finishing my food. "Okay done, let's go for a walk!"

"A walk?" Andy lifted his sunglasses to look at me "a walk?"

"Yes, a walk" I replied

"I have the perfect place to walk too" Andy smiled and stood up, lifting me up, kissing my forehead.

"Where are we walking to?"

"I'll show you"

We held hands as he walked me down the streets of Sydney. I noticed familiar streets but didn't realise exactly where I was going till I passed a cafe, the smell of fresh coffee and toasted sandwiches filled the air, and being a Saturday people were dressed up and having lunch with their friends. We were heading to the venue. I bit my tongue, didn't want to ruin Andy's surprise.

"Tada!" He chuckled as he walked me to it, I laughed and kissed his cheek.

"The first place we met" He smiled

"And we saw the best band of all time" he added

"And I saw the most beautiful man of all time" I lovingly brought him closer to me, he kissed me softly.

"If only Andy knew, that the boy he walked out of that venue with would still be around, six weeks later..." He spoke softer as I rested my head to his, my stomach full of butterflies.

'I think I'm in love with you' I went to say, but then he said it

"I know I'm in love with you"

I felt like I lost touch with reality, my butterflies now in my chest, I smiled wide, feeling myself get teary.

"I know I'm in love with you, too"

He cupped my face as I held him close by the shirt, his lips passionately smashing to mine, moments passed and I realised we were in public, so I pulled away.

"I love you" he whispered in my ear, it sent tingles down my spine.

"I love you" I said back, kissing him lightly.


	9. Chapter 9

We've been in a relationship for week now and I haven't felt so content, because now I KNOW he's definitely mine. That cheeky, sarcastic weirdo with golden hair and bright blue eyes is mine and it makes me so happy. At school, he'll wrap his arms around my shoulders, not caring about what people say, we make out in the portables and he always walks me to class, no matter if he's late or not. He reminds me almost every hour that he loves me and that he isn't going anywhere. He makes me feel so special and I never want to lose him and these holidays, I want nothing but to spend time with him, no matter how hot and sticky the weather gets.

I went to his house after school today just because I could, and dad would be fine picking me up. My family are okay now, they've warmed up to the fact we're together and it's not a big worry, I suppose. We both have siblings that can continue the family name, we're content and happy as we are.

"Damn the house is empty" Andy walked back to the kitchen where I was eating yoghurt from the snack sized tub that was "shrek" brand.

"No one at all?" I raised an eyebrow, someone is usually home. He shook his head

"Everyone's busy, I suppose. But that's okay" he grinned, grabbing the yoghurt off me and putting it on the bench.

"That means we can make out"

"Hm, I like that" I smirked, he grabbed my hips and I helped him lift me onto the bench as we kissed slowly, deeply, my fingers entwined in his hair as he held me close, sucking my lip softly. I exhaled and touched his tongue with mine and off we went.

As we got more heated, I hopped off the bench and kept kissing him as we walked to his bedroom, he pinned me against the back of the door and smirked under my lips as I moaned.

"God, I love you"

"I love you more" he mumbled, his fingers running softly over my hips as his lips kissed to my neck.

"I love you the most" I breathed as he sucked on my neck, his crotch pressed hard on mine, I was so turned on but I held myself back from proceeding any further, he pulled away from my neck with a smirk.

"Have fun explaining that to your parents" he chuckled, I pushed him back onto his bed.

"Fucking dickhead"

"But you love me" he pouted

"Yeah I do" I smiled, sitting next to him.

"Isn't it weird how hot and heavy we get and then we just...don't fuck"

I stared at him blankly "I...guess"

"I mean, I've never gone this far with anyone, only you so it's kind of strange"

I laid down and looked in his eyes.

"Well maybe one day we'll go further?" I suggested

He bit his lip

"I want it to be right and I want to be with you for at least three months before we do that...and like, being two men, we'll need patience and time to try new things..."

"Yeah, we can't rush into this" Andy agreed, I smiled, leaning over and kissing him softly. I still hadn't told him about my past and I feel like I should in order for this to get further. So I took a deep breath.

"Do you want to know about my past? I feel like you've told me your whole life story and I've only given you like, a fraction of it" I sat up as did Andy

"Well yeah. I want to get to know you more"

"This is also good so when we do get more...into it, you'll know what to expect"

He brushed my dark brown hair out of my eyes and smiled

"I agree"

"Well" I looked down, my hair swooping back "It's pretty messed up...I did stuff"

"Like what?" Andy worried, I bit my lip

"I used to self harm" I looked in his eyes to see that he looked gutted.

"Oh shit, was it bad?"

"No, not really. Wasn't anything major, but I have 'scratched' myself with a blade probably on most spots on my body. My thighs the most, that's where I didn't care how it looked. So there is a few thin white lines...but nothing major"

"Well at least it wasn't life threatening...how long did you do it for?"

"Three years, I stopped a month before Blink, I kinda just did it and went 'I don't want to be this person anymore' and stopped. I've been good and haven't felt any urge, strangely enough. I'm happy."

Andy just smiled, as did I

"But" I added, my smile fading. It felt weird saying this things out loud

"I tried to..."

"What?" Andy worried again and I sighed

"Die"

Andy stayed quiet

"It was the worst year of my life and I tried to OD on ibuprofen...that's when my parents put their foot down and made me move to Hunters"

The tone in the room was duller now, but he had to know me.

"I-I see" he cleared his throat

"I told you it's messed up"

"No! No, it's more that. I know where you're coming from. Last year, I was suicidal from stress and this family and mum almost kicked me out to live with dad and that was when I thought 'I'm done' and almost jumped in front of a bus...but I didn't want to because that would include people wasting their time on my funeral and getting me back together and just tears among tears. I'm definitely happier now then I was then, but I still contemplate about running away, which I want to do often" he confessed, I wrapped myself around him, snuggling into his neck.

"Well I'm glad you're still here"

"Ditto" he kissed my head

"And know that whenever you have the need to run away, stay at mine. Or tell me and I'll run away with you"

"To the second star on the right?" He asked with a slight laugh

"Always the second star on the right" I whispered, kissing him softly.

"I love you"

"I love, you"

When I heard dad's horn, I kissed him and ran out and missed him immediately. I missed everything about him.

I sat at my desk listening to Blink as I revised on my homework, trying to focus but found it difficult because Andy hasn't called, and he usually would call. The bit of anxiety in my mind kept saying it was because he was weirded out by my past, but no, that couldn't be it.

Then I jolted as the phone rang, I grabbed it before anyone had a chance and held it to my ear.

"Hello?"

"Shaun" Andy sniffed, I stiffened, I've never heard him so sad.

"Andy? What happened?"

"Y-You know how my family weren't home?"

"...yeah?"

"Well, it turns out they were at the hospital. Nan had another fall and she's passed from a head injury. They pulled the plug like, an hour ago" his voice shook, I felt devastated for him. Earlier today we were talking about death, this was just a lot for him to handle.

"Shit...Andy I'm so sorry, I know she meant a lot to you"

"Eh" he sniffed again with an empty laugh "guess I should've seen it coming"

"I love you, so much" I reminded him. I felt awful.

"Do you love me enough to be there with me for the funeral? I can't do this alone"

"Of course!"

"Thank you. Know I love you"

"I know"

"Is that blink in the background I hear?" He sounded a bit more enthusiastic, I giggled

"Yep! Aliens Exist"

"Fuck yes!"

I laughed

"Look, I'm gonna go to bed, okay? I don't know if I'll be at school. But if not I'll come visit you after, okay? I love you so, so much."

I was sad that he might not be at school, but he had a right to.

"That's okay Andy. I love you too, lots and lots"

I could hear the smile in his voice as he said "goodnight"

I went to bed feeling like shit for Andy, this really must be terrible to deal with, she meant a lot to him.

I went over to Andy's the next day because I knew he'd need someone, and he's a home-body so he wouldn't leave the house for no reason. I knocked on the door and heard him running down the hall, I grinned slightly as he opened the door.

"Oh hey" he smiled slightly as he let me in, I wrapped my arms around his neck as I kissed him, he pulled away and chuckled.

"My horoscopes predicted a Leo would come and make me feel better"

I laughed slightly with my eyebrow raised "you read your horoscope?"

Andy kissed my cheek with a giggle "no, but I was bored and read mums magazines. Taurus' are apparently very stylish-well according to cosmopolitan"

I bursted into laughter as I followed him to the kitchen

"Oh God"

He smirked, grabbing the pre-made cold green cordial from the fridge, pouring us both drinks.

"How was last night?" I asked, he shrugged, passing me the glass "pretty quiet, everyone went to bed, I honestly don't know how to feel, but I heard on TV that soundwave is good this year. We should go"

He changed the subject, clearly uncomfortable

"Yeah...yeah of course"

He cleared his throat and sighed "I can't even cry about her, I mean, I loved her, she was my nana and I knew everything about her, as she did, me"

I smiled slightly and grabbed his hands

"People only cry when they're in love and when they didn't get to know them better. You knew your nan, and you know she'd never want you to feel sorrow. She knows you deserve the world" I consoled him, wrapping my arms around him as he snuggled into me with a sigh.

"You know, as much i'd hate to be that self-loathing guy that relies on a human more than himself but-god, you're the only good thing going in my life"

"And I, you" I smiled slightly, squeezing him a bit.

I got home late, welcomed by a mother and father, scolding me for not telling them where I was, and no matter how hard I tried to explain that my boyfriend was upset, they didn't listen.

And of course, they grounded me. Let's see how long this will last. I'll probably throw a tantrum, they can take my guitar, my cellphone, my stereo and my TV and telephone privileges for as long as they want. They just have to realise how annoying I'm about to become.

"What you doing?" I asked my dad who was fixing the car in the garage, he raised an eyebrow at me

"What the fuck does it look like? I'm fixing the car" he said with that abrupt voice of his, taking a gulp of beer.

"Oh cool" I stood there, swaying myself forward and backwards.

He ignored me, continuing to check on the car.

"What does this do?" I asked, pointing to the engine, he sighed and looked at me.

"What? Did grounding cause you to go dumb? It's an engine"

"Oh cool, what if I put water in this part for you?" Asking as I pointed to where the oil goes. He glared at me as I smiled.

"What the fuck do you want Shaun. I've had a long day at work. Don't you have a boyfriend to fuck or something?"

"Unfortunately not right now" I replied casually, knowing he was getting angry

"What? You break up?"

"Nope. We've got promise rings. No sex"

He closed the hood and laughed as he walked back inside, I followed

"Well lucky for you, that can't happen since you're both fags with the legs of 12 year old girls"

"Hilarious" I sarcastically replied, he smiled at me

"Also heard taking it up in the ass is painful"

"Or did you just learn that from mum shoving things up your ass"

He froze, I smirked, he turned around, his eyes furious.

"You disgusting freak, go to your room"

I stared at him

"Go!"

"Fiiineee" I whined as I slouched, walking away before yelling

"MUM!"

"What Shaun!?" She yelled back, running over.

"Dad called me a fag and a disgusting freak!" I covered my face, pretending to sob.

"Not buying it Shaun. Bed, now"

"Only if you give me my stuff back"

She exhaled annoyed, licking her lips.

"Then that wouldn't be a grounding then, would it?"

"Well, shouldn't have done it in the first place" I smiled, she approached me slowly, patronising with her finger pointed right at me.

"Shaun Donald Patrick Diviney, I shouldn't have to tell you again! Bed, now"

"Revoke my grounding, then I'll think about it"

"Fine, die of sleep deprivation. No pancakes for breakfast for you, just corn flakes" she walked away

"YOU CANT DIE FROM ONE NIGHT WITHOUT SLEEP MUM! AND I HATE YOUR DRY BURNT PANCAKES ANYWAY!" I yelled

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Luke yelled from across the house

"MAKE ME!"

No reply, I snickered and went into my room, crashing on my bed. This was only the beginning.


	10. Chapter 10

"Grounded? But then you can't come to the funeral with me" Andy frowned, picking at yet another sandwich, throwing it at the portable walls, I shrugged.

"Don't worry, I'll pretend to have a break down over exams or something. I'll be coming" I gave him a promising look, he sighed

"They should let you go if they have a soul"

"That's the thing" I laughed, sitting on top of him, pulling the sandwich off him. "They don't"

He smiled and kissed me quickly.

"Did your dad really call us fags with legs like 12 year old girls?" He bit his lip

"Honestly, be more concerned as to why he's looking at 12 year old girls' legs in the first place"

We both laughed, I smiled

"How do you do that?" He asked

"Do what?" I wondered

"Somehow turn every negative thing I think about into a positive?"

"I'm your boyfriend, i bring the positivity" I smirked, cupping his face, he chuckled, leaning in

"Right..."

I pinned his head against the wall, grabbing tight on his hair as I kissed him passionately, he pulled me closer, pinning me against him as we kissed deeply, remembering to lightly inhale and exhale. God, I was so lucky to have him.

We stopped kissing once the bell rang, I pulled away slowly, his lips holding onto mine for a second longer.

"That's our queue...I love you" I whispered, kissing his cheek as I got up, running to my next class. Physical Education warm up, I suppose.

"Mum please! Can I please not be grounded anymore! Andy's grandma is dead, I just want to be there to comfort him!" I only raised my voice the slightest as she grated the carrots for dinner.

"You've only been grounded for 3 days"

"Yeah, and I've been in love with him for three months!" I felt myself begin to cry from being angry

"Shaun-"

I stormed off, slamming my bedroom door behind me. My parents were unfair to me. The second it's something that matters to me, they won't give a shit. Don't they remember what happened back when we lived in Newcastle? How can they not remember me on the floor, throwing my guts up. We moved so I could start fresh, and they just make me feel lower each time.

"Dinners ready!" Mum called out, I laid in my bed, listening to the rush of my family's feet running to the table, clinking glasses and forks and knives on plates. I wasn't even hungry, I actually was feeling like shit. Maybe I didn't need to fake a break down. Moments like this is where Andy would fart and giggle like a 3 year old and make me gag yet laugh so hard I cried. I adored him, so much and I think I'm falling harder and harder because he's the only one I want. Ever.

Maybe it was the silence, or the stress of exams, but even in an empty room I felt held down. I hate these nights, I hate being grounded. Maybe I could sneak out and sneak in Andy's window.

I heard three knocks on the door before It opened "Shaun?" My mum spoke softly, closing the door slowly, I rolled over and looked at her

"Are you really in love with Andy?"

"From the moment I saw him" I mumbled

"You sure?"

I nodded

"Never felt anything like this, mum"

She sighed and sat on my bed

"And you really want to go to this funeral?"

"He needs me..."

Mum stroked my hair softly with a smile "fine, you can go...and you're not grounded, we're sorry we did. Things are always difficult around here and we have to know you have issues too"

I sat up and hugged my mum

"Thank you..."

"Love you Shaun"

"Love you mum"


	11. Chapter 11

"You look good Andy I promise" I rubbed my hand up and down his back as he fixed his tie for the fourth time.

"This is just a lot to handle, I still can't believe it."

I turned him around and started fixing the collar, kissing him softly.

"I know, it'll be okay...I'll be right here" I squeezed his shoulders before letting go as we walked to the car in our suit and ties, Andy wrapped his arms around my waist, resting his head on my shoulder, I let out a sad sigh as I kissed his head, rubbing his back.

"It'll all be fine..."

"No, it's just-everything's catching up to me"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm failing, which means I won't pass to get into the uni course I want, because I'm not smart at anything, and dad's gonna kick my ass."

"Gerald won't-"

"Not Gerald, Shaun. John, my father" he looked at me properly before getting in the car, I got in the other side.

"I promise you'll pass, I'll help you"

"You're year 11, I'm year 12, how the hell-"

"I'm smarter than I look"

Andy squeezed my knee

"Just don't worry about it...as long as I don't lose you, I'm good"

"You never will" I smiled, assuring him.

The funeral was long, Andy cried when she was lowered into the ground, I have never seen him so sad in my whole life. I'd hate to think that he's depressed again, because I suck at being a great boyfriend but I want nothing more than for him to be happy.

We walked into his room where he sat on his bed looking at the floor. He wouldn't say a word for at least 30 seconds, and I was there staring at him.

"You don't have to stay if you don't want to" he mumbled

"No, I'm staying, I'm your boyfriend and you need me" I replied, sitting besides him with my head on his shoulder, grabbing his hand to link our fingers

"I'm also worried about you, about this school thing and just you mentally. You've been so quiet when your usually all talkative and smiling, I don't understand-"

"My grandmother is dead and i watched her get lowered into the ground. Why would I be smiling?"

"You know that's not what I mean"

Andy looked at me with a distasteful look, instantly, I regretted opening my mouth.

"I think it's best if you go"

"Andy-"

"Shaun I don't need this, not right now"

I stared at him before letting go of his hand

"Fine. Sorry I tried"

I walked out, slamming the door behind me. I don't know what this meant, but I was trying not to think about it as I walked to the train station.

Once I got to my room and kicked my shoes off, putting on my shorts and t-shirt mum called out to me to do the laundry. I rolled my eyes with a deep sigh and got started, putting things from washer to dryer and putting on another load. Why does my family own so many clothes when I only own like, four shirts, three jeans, pyjamas and shorts? I can't understand that

I finally got into my bed starting to read a comic book I borrowed off Bradie, i started to become paranoid with how Andy treated me. But I kept telling myself to shut the fuck up and focus on the comic. Andy's clearly upset, I shouldn't be such a bitch about it.

It wasn't till I woke up on Saturday morning that I heard knocks at the door and answered to find Andy standing there

"Did you come to break up with me?"my croaky voice asked

Andy laughed and came inside, walking to my room, I followed

"Never. We're both too stubborn to quit. We're like two lions in a pride, never going to give each other up. We'd fight about love for eternity"

The way he used those words fizzed my tummy, I smirked.

"Seems about right."

Andy looked over at me and smiled, I felt flustered

"I love you" I added

"I know" he grinned, kissing my softly, I breathed deeply as I kissed him back. He grabbed my ass playfully.

"Also love these shorts on you"

"Shut up" I laughed, shoving him off.

He looked me up and down so lustfully that it made me smirk

"You want me, don't you?"

"Wouldn't you like that" he spoke back flirtatiously, making me chuckle

"I know you would"

Andy looked at me for a speechless second before huffing a laugh

"Yeah well that's not going to happen yet"

"Maybe soon, maybe, I've been thinking about it a lot..." I admitted, biting my lip, he grinned

"A lot, huh? What type of stuff do you think about?"

"Uhh" I cleared my throat, shifting awkwardly "little bit R rated to talk about"

"Who does who?" He asked, so simply, I could hardly push out the answer.

"Y-You do me"

He smirked "funny, I always think of you doing me"

"Maybe we can take turns?"

Andy laughed "sure why not" he jumped onto my bed, laying down "but we need to go slow with these things..."

I got butterflies in my stomach, like something amazing was about to happen, can we start doing stuff now?

"What are you thinking?"

"Just kiss me" he breathed, and I did, I jumped on top of him, my fingers looped in his hair as I kissed him soft and slow, the brush of his lips warmed me up as his fingers run up my shirt, tingling my back, I exhaled as I pushed the kiss deeper, Andy slowly pushed his tongue into the kiss, causing me to moan.

"God I love you" I breathed between kisses, I felt his smirk as he kissed down to my neck, his hand shaking as it made it's way down the back of my pants, squeezing gently.

"Know I love you more" he whispered hungrily, kissing my neck with his hot tongue, pushing my crotch down onto his, a moan escaped my lips, Andy proceeded to talk into my ear.

"Touch me..."

I breathed nervously as Andy looked in my eyes, an inviting smile soft on his face, I kissed him softly then started sliding down his body, tracing the air between his body and my finger, his body heat radiating onto me, yet I caused goosebumps, I smirked and looked at him again, he nodded.

"I'm ready"

I unzipped his pants and giggled at his huge boner. Who knew he was going commando.

"That's cute"

"S-shut up" he breathed as his face went red. I grabbed his warm length and moved him the way I'd move myself, up and down, slowly. He threw his head back instantly, my crotch twitched. He was so beautiful, almost mouth-watering, so hot, all mine.

I let go of him and he looked at me as I moved back up, kissing him slowly, our tongues lightly touching. I unzipped my shorts

"Touch me the way I touch you" I breathed as I kissed him more passionate, he moaned as our tongues softly battled and twined, I grabbed his length again, pumping him at a better pace now, he hesitated before putting his hand down my boxers, just rubbing up and down my shaft, I groaned under his kiss, it was better than touching myself, is the only way I can describe it. It's explosive, like the earth colliding with the sun.

I grabbed him tighter, pumping faster, he whimpered as he grabbed me properly, pumping me at the same pace. It didn't take us that long to get here, because we were just so into it. Our lips got sloppy, groaning, panting and moaning as we went on, I pulled away, pushing my head into his chest as I started thrusting into his hand as he pumped, I couldn't tell if he was doing the same. I was in another world by this moment. He rolled me onto my back, kissing my neck as he thrusted into my hand, pumping me faster. I was moaning so loud by now I couldn't hold it back, and hearing Andy in my ear was bliss, I grabbed onto his back, pulling on his shirt as I felt it, the earth burning hotter from the sun, I moaned and groaned and nothing could stop him, since he were exactly the same.

"F-fuck!" I cried out as I came.

We looked into each other's eyes with so much lust and love, I pumped him as hard and fast as I could and in under three seconds, his head pressed into my chest, whimpering as he orgasmed and it was the hottest thing I had ever heard. It was so raw and beautiful, like I had a stronger addiction to him now.

"Shit" he laughed, kissing my neck softly "that was amazing"

"Ditto" I laughed breathlessly before he looked at me, I kissed his lips lightly

"I love you" I breathed, he smiled and pressed his head to mine

"I love you too...now let's clean up before we get sticky"

"Definitely. You might want to shower, massive sweat stain on your back"

"Shut up" he laughed, kissing me as he got up.

My family got home just after we were finished, luckily. After dinner, we just cuddled in bed. After what happened today, I felt so much closer to him, like there was nothing stopping us now. I love him, in every possible way there has ever been.

"You're so beautiful" Andy whispered, running his fingers lightly along my cheek, I snuggled further into his chest. I almost felt like crying, I don't know.

"You make me so happy Andy, I'll love you forever"

"For infinity" Andy's voice seemed so ambitious of that, he kissed my forehead as we proceeded to slowly fall asleep, tangled in each other beneath the sheets.


	12. Chapter 12

It's the weekend before the last week of school, it's 35 degrees (Celsius) and Andrew and I finished our end of year exams. We were exhausted and the humid weather didn't seem to help. We thought about going to the beach or to our friends house because he has a pool, but that meant sun, and interacting with people that weren't each other. Even at this moment we weren't doing anything. I was lightly strumming Blink on my guitar as he laid between my legs, closing his eyes and listening.

We have had a few moments since the last time, if you know what I mean, but when we make out, there's definite dry humping and touching involved and Andy moves his hips so well I just don't understand it. But being half virgins now, we weren't so scared to discover every inch of each other's anatomy.

I smiled as I strummed a few basic chords, singing

"Andyyyyy, you're so prettyyyyy, lying there in your underwearrrr, andyyyy, your sweat is sticking you to my legs but I don't caree, you're perfect thereeee"

He smiled wide, opening his eyes, his bright blue eyes brighter now that they were opened

"I love you" he mouthed, I chuckled.

"I love you!"

He sat up, the sound of his head lifting off my thigh wasn't pleasant, but refreshing to have air from the fan hit it.

"You're right about the sweat though. Totally not worth it, but!"

He reached over to my bedside table, grabbing my permanent marker, I just watched him, an eyebrow raised. He laid down again, looking at my thigh as he pulled the cap off with his teeth, writing something on my leg, he giggled cheekily when he was finished. It read.

'Andy Clemmensen was here'

I laughed "you think you're funny don't you"

"You think I'm funny" he smiled big, kissing my thigh quickly before sitting up.

"You're really talented, by the way" he compliment, nodding his head to my guitar"

"Thanks" I smiled, trying not to blush, he's the first to compliment me on it.

"We should start a band" Andy spoke casually, as he did a lot before grabbing his glass of Coke.

I thought about it for a second, as if I hadn't thought of it before

"Sure, why not? I mean, I suck at having a job and you and Bradie work at Pizza Hut-"

"Dominoes"

"Whatever, what I'm saying is that we could make something out of this"

Andy smiled, he seemed hopeful "Bradie's good at drums too, and it'd be good for all of us to hang out"

"Yeah" I laughed "well, let's start a band"

We got in contact with Bradie and he said he was all for it, I already had a few songs written from years ago. I played them to Andy, he enjoyed them but also didn't because he knew what they were about-the worst years of my life.

Andy had borrowed some books about learning bass at the library and was doing pretty well, I was so proud of him. I can't believe his dad just brought him a bass as if it were nothing, it was really weird. And meeting him was weirder, just when I thought Andy's mum looked like him, John looked so much more like him.

"Gerald's doing a barbecue for dinner, did you want to stay the night?" Andy asked as he walked into his room with two drinks for us.

"Gerald's barbecue? How could I say no!" I chuckled and grabbed the glass, taking a sip. We moved from my house to his simply for the air conditioning, and I wanted to help him with bass, I learnt some bass at my old school so I thought I'd help.

"See each of these frets is a different note depending on the note of the string. Like this" I held the bass, putting my finger on a note, Andy's eyes watching me "E string, put your finger here on the second fret, you got yourself a G"

Andy kissed my cheek lightly, I smiled

"What are you doing?"

"You're a pretty hot teacher" he whispered, I giggled "maybe you should find the D for me" I flirted cheekily

"Oh I love when you talk music to me" he smirked, I kissed his lips gently, Andy placed his hands on my cheeks, kissing me deeper, I exhaled softly as we continued to kiss slowly, he pulled the bass off me, carefully putting it onto the ground as I lay down on his bed, he got on top of me, our lips glued together as I ran my hands all over him, down his torso, up his shirt, down his pants. He pushed his tongue into the kiss, i smirked as we made out like this for a while, he started to slowly hump my crotch, making me moan as our lips became a sloppy mess, never wanting to stop. It's like he flipped a switch on something in us and had become rabbits, constantly wanting it, because we could never give enough.

His lips stuck to my neck, he was sucking and biting, trying to give me a hickey which I didn't care about anymore, it felt good and ran through my veins like a drug, I wrapped my legs around his waist as he thrusted harder against my crotch, I bit my lip to contain my moans, some would slip out every now and again.

Andy started to go down, pulling my shirt up and kissing my stomach as he did so, I just watched him, whatever he was going to do, I wanted it.

He unzipped my jeans and grabbed my dick, he smirked at me as he began to suck on it, I threw my head back and whimpered, gripping onto his hair.

"Fuck" I breathed as his hot mouth moved up and down, my heart was racing, the butterflies in my stomach swarmed into my heart, it was so good, better than a hand-job. I wrapped my legs around his neck and bucked my hips, Andy groaned as he tried to take all of me into his mouth. I was trying so hard not to cry out in pleasure.

"F-fuck I'm close..." I moaned softly as I pulled his hair. He got faster, moving up and down, pushing my legs apart, grabbing my hands and entwining our fingers as I felt myself grow hotter and hotter like a kettle at boiling point.

"Oh fuck, oh f-fuck!" I cried out, my orgasm shining through at the lowest sound I could. I came and Andy just sat there for a moment before pulling away and swallowing my load, I was speechless.

"Taste isn't too bad" he shrugged, breathless

I grinned at him, breathing heavily "my turn?"

Andy smirked, I zipped my pants back up and pushed him down, he giggled. I started kissing his neck deeply as I pulled up his shirt, trailing kisses down his torso, unzipping his pants.

I was terrified of this next moment, my brain was screaming with "do it!" "Don't do it!" And my heart was screaming "yes!"

And so I did it

The taste of him was divine, I moved my head up and down, Andy moaned softly.

"God Shaun, I love you"

I wanted to say I love you too, but I can't when his dick is in my mouth.

It didn't take long for Andy, but I devoured each moment, my tongue pulsed against his head as I sucked harder, the harder I sucked, the more he'd moan. I loved pleasing him, I don't know why, but it's such a dominant, crazy type of feeling.

"Right there!" Andy cried as I continued as fast as I could, he tensed around me, gripping onto the sheets as he began to orgasm

"Shit! Yes yes! Oh god Shaun!" He let out a wild orgasm, I felt this weird texture in my mouth, I just swallowed it without thought and pulled away with a smirk.

"Think you'll be a bit embarrassed to leave your room after that" I smirked up at him, breathless

"Shut up" he huffed a chuckle, throwing his head back, I zipped his pants up and crawled back on top of him, kissing his nose softly.

"Is it scaring you how serious we're getting? How in love we are?" I asked curiously, Andy looked in my eyes worried.

"Is it scaring you?"

"No-no, in fact, I love it, I love knowing I have you and can have you forever, and have that same feeling returned" I admitted, he smiled, kissing me softly.

"It may not be legal yet, but I will be the one who marries you, Shaun"

I smirked, hiding my blush as I pressed my face into his chest. "You seem so determined of that"

Andy slowly ran his fingers up and down my back

"I am" was all he said, and we stayed there for a while until we got too hungry and began to stiffen from lying for too long. We got up and slowly made our way out of the bedroom, lucky to see that everyone was outside, surrounding the barbecue.

Andy grabbed us both a can of coke before we made our way outside. His sister smirked at me, was there a hickey on my neck?

"Hey boys! How nice of you to join" Gerald smiled at us quickly before he focused on the steaks sizzling on the barbie.

"We're starving" Andy said, rubbing his tummy slightly.

"Is that why you ate Shaun's neck?" His sister implied sarcastically, I felt myself go hot in the face, taking a shaky sip from my coke, sitting besides Bradie.

"Go fuck yourself" Andy spat back, I laughed slightly, looking at my can.

"You seem flustered" Bradie sniggered, I slapped his arm

"Shut up. I read that comic book, by the way. Wasn't feeling it" I shrugged

"How can you not?" He acted offended, I chuckled, sipping my coke

"If it's not batman, it's not my thing"

"You're just like Andy"

"Funny that" I smirked, he laughed

At 11:30pm, everyone was asleep, I was in Andy's arms, just listening to his even breathing in my ear, it was so comforting, but I was in no way tired. I got out of bed, pulling my pants and shirt on, planting a kiss on his forehead before I went out to the kitchen, grabbing a glass of water, trying to make no sound.

"Andy? That you?" I heard Bradie whisper from the lounge, I walked over, leaning on the arch frame

"Not even close" I chuckled quietly

"Do you know how to play spyro?"

"Of course dude"

"Good, help me unlock this. Andy hates spyro" he passed me the play station remote, I sat next to him, beginning to play.

"Andy told me about that, how you ran off with it and completed it again whilst he only got halfway through the game"

"He took too long" Bradie whined, I laughed, focused on the screen.

"What's it like?" Bradie asked, I raised an eyebrow, still focused on the screen, the lighting of the room was making me tired

"What's what like?" I replied, Bradie simply replied

"Taking it up the butt"

I paused the game and looked at him, why the fuck would he ask that.

"I honestly don't know" I answered, going back to playing

"You guys haven't had sex?"

"We've given each other blow jobs, no sex, not yet"

"Are you scared that it'll feel like taking a shit backwards?"

I couldn't help but laugh "well apparently it hurts the first few times for a girl with a vagina when it comes to sex so yeah, it might, for the first few times. If god was against anal, honestly, he would've given our asses a gag reflex"

Me and Bradie both laughed

"Ooh you've nearly got it!" Bradie enthused as I played.

"Do you really love my brother?"

"Yeah, probably too much, why?"

"It's just, from what I've overheard, I think his dad wants him to live with him for a while, till his grade picks up. Meaning-he has to redo year twelve. Which means he's on an automatic grounding."

"So I won't see him?" I asked as I unlocked what he wanted, passing him the remote "there"

"Thanks, and yeah, something like that"

"Does he know?" I asked, Bradie shook his head

"Our parents don't even know that I know. Don't tell him okay? Just Incase they change their mind"

I felt suddenly saddened, i wanted to spend more time with Andy, if this was the case.

"He does love you Shaun. I've seen him try with so many girls and guys, they don't last longer than 3-4 weeks, he really does love you. You're all he talks about"

I smiled, huffing a short breath. My Andy.

"Well I'm going back to bed, spyro makes me tired" I stretched, getting up.

"Alright. Catch you in the morning"

"See ya" I smiled, carefully going back to Andy's room. I crawled back between his arms, he breathed a snore, holding me close, I giggled, closing my eyes. I felt the need to rush things with him now, knowing that we may not be allowed to see each other for a while. I mean, I love him, but in the time he's gone, I wonder if he'll be over me or not.

I woke up, still content that I was in his arms, he sheepishly smiled, closing his eyes again "it's early, go back to sleep"

"Why were you awake?" I croaked

"Thinkin" Andy sighed

"About what?"

"How beautiful you are..."

"I fucking love you, I want you to remember that" I felt my eyes get heavy, Andy opened his eyes.

"I don't need to remember, I know, and I love you, so much"

I leaned over, kissing him tenderly, Andy ran his fingers slowly up and down my back as we kissed, he always held onto my lips a millisecond longer.

"I'm not going anywhere" he had promise in his voice, as if he just thought I had a bad dream and was delusional, but no, I knew he was going somewhere. I pushed my head into his chest with a sigh, closing my eyes.

"I won't go if you will never leave" Andy breathed, kissing my head, I smiled, he's read my fucking lyrics.

"Shut up and sleep, clemmensen"

"Will do, diviney" he chuckled

"I love you" I breathed, drifting off

"I love you" Andy whispered, squeezing me tighter as I fell deeper in love, and deeper into sleep.

"Wake up" I heard Andy say softly in my ear as I woke up, the sun shining through the curtains, causing me to groan and keep my eyes closed.

"Morning sunshine" he laughed "I got you breakfast-well it's milo and eggs on toast but still"

I opened my eyes slowly and looked at him standing there with the mug and a plate in his boxers, I smiled.

"You're gorgeous, I hope you know that" I croaked, clearing my throat as I sat up. Andy sat the plate on my lap and put the milo on the bedside table

"You should learn to shut up" he smirked, kissing my forehead.

I got into my meal right away as Andy turned on his cheap Sony box TV, putting the morning cartoons on, I could help but smile.

"Why're you spoiling me?"

"Does there need to be a reason?" He asked, I shook my head with a shrug

"No, but I guess I'm not used to this attention"

Andy scruffed up my terrible bed hair "well get used to it"

After I ate, Andy forced me out of bed, he wanted to take me for a walk down at the beach, for some reason. I said good morning to Bradie who was still playing video games as we walked out.

We got off the bus stop at our local beach, Andy held my hand and started leading me somewhere as we talked about stupid shit our friends were doing.

"I can't wait till I've finished school" Andy took off his thongs, as if I weren't going to question that.

"Why?" I asked anyway, taking off my thongs as well, well I borrowed them off Andy. We entwined our fingers, walking towards the ocean

"Drinking, doing whatever I want, get my P plates, I'm stoked. Can't do shit like drinking here with mum, she always says "you gotta focus on your grades before you do that shit. Just because you're eighteen doesn't mean you're allowed" but if I ever had to move to dad's I'd be drinking every night"

Somehow I didn't like that thought

"Are you thinking about moving to your dad's?" I but my lip, Andy pointed to a spot and sat down, I sat with him.

"No, my dad's either fun or a 1940's teacher, there's no in between with him. Like yeah, he's chill with what I do but as long as I pass, get into university or whatever it is he expects me to do" he sighed, picking at the sand, I rested my head against his shoulder.

"Are you planning on going to uni?"

"Nope, nothing I really want to do with my life. I just want to travel, but you need money-probably gonna be at dominoes forever" he laughed sarcastically, I wrapped my arm around his waist, looking out to the waves.

"You'd be a hot tradie"

Andy laughed "yeah, I'll fix your plumbing-but I've missed out on the chance to do the course, so it'll take years-"

"Hey, look at me" I grabbed his chin, making him look into my eyes. "I believe in you, whatever you do, I believe in you" i whispered softly before kissing him, he sighed into the kiss.

"I'm so lucky to have you"

I smiled, leaning against his head.

"I, you"


	13. Chapter 13

"Fuck turd shit mother fucker!" I yelled, smashing the buttons on the nintendo 64. Bradie laughed, stupid evil Bradie, beating me. He can't beat me at my own game! Mario Kart is a shit.

"Bradie's 2nd and you're 4th, come on!" Andy tapped my head, I pouted.

"You're a terrible coach"

"And you're terrible in bed"

I smirked "who else can make you scream the way I do?" I looked over at him, he winked.

"Right here, guys. Sitting right here" Bradie butted in, I laughed. We haven't even had sex yet, although I want to. Kinda really bad.

"Yay!" Bradie cheered as he finished, I frowned.

"Stupid game" stupid Bradie

"I'm going to make some nachos, I'm hungry as a mother fucker" Andy got up, pulling his pants. I kicked his butt, he looked back at me.

"You're cheeky today. I like it" he giggled, walking off, I smiled before turning to Bradie who didn't look amused.

"Really?"

"Shut up" I laughed, trying not to blush

"Are you home alone tonight?" He asked me, I raised my eyebrow.

"Odd question, but yeah"

"Okay, well you should invite Andy over, any night could be your last with him" Bradie turned to me, I was still confused

"What do you mean?"

"His mum is going to break the news to him soon, like, a few days soon, maybe tomorrow, who knows"

"Shit" I sighed, resting my head on my hand.

"So I suggest, not only as your best friend but as his brother, that you take him home and spoil the fuck out of him. Maybe even go all the way"

I raised my eyebrow again

"Just a suggestion. You need to give Andy a reason to stick around, he wears his heart on his sleeve. You have to make him happy and not sad, alright?"

"Yeah, I hear you" I sighed with a sad smile

Andy came back with the nachos

"Why haven't you guys started a new race yet?" He asked with his mouth full.

"Waiting for you-hey, wanna stay over tonight?" I asked, Andy lit up "I'd love that"

"Good" I grinned

"New race Shaun, get ready!" Bradie nudged me and I quickly paid attention, getting ready.

"So" Andy dragged, leaning against my kitchen counter. I was focused on making our dinner, I started cutting up onion for our spaghetti.

"So?"

"So what's with the random invite? Home alone, cooking me dinner. Bit domestic"

I laughed anxiously, putting the onion in the pan.

"No reason, just thought I'd give back, since you've given me so much"

"Like what?" He grinned as I washed my hands, he knew exactly what tonight was going to be, I could tell.

"Like-breakfast in bed, gifts, like that Pokemon shirt you got me, uhm, happiness, freedom. Most importantly, you" I smiled, Andy wrapped his arms around me suddenly, kissing my neck.

"You're cute"

"You're annoying" I joked "go sit down, this shouldn't take long.

"Yeah I know you don't" he giggled, walking away.

"Watch that attitude" i warned with a smirk, going back to dinner.

After we ate, we watched TV, fighting between Channels.

"Pleaseeeee let me watch big brother" Andy pouted, I laughed and passed him the remote, kissing his cheek.

"Of course. I gotta go pee" I got up, Andy just nodded as I made my way to my room, I walked in and closed the door carefully.

I quickly lit the vanilla scented candles and made sure there was enough for the room to be lit up on it's own. I got the rose petals I took from next doors garden and started covering my bed, before rushing and pressing play on my stereo, putting it on low as the mixtape he made for me played. I also opened a packet of party mix lollies and put them on the bed side counter, for extra effect. I knew he loved food.

I smiled, the butterflies in my stomach growing stronger. This was it. He's the old-fashioned romance kind of guy, and I wanted it to be as old-fashioned and cheesy as possible.

I slowly walked back out to Andy who was taking a sip of his lemonade, I scratched my lip. Now how would I get him to my room?

"Hey..." I spoke suggestively, trying to look casual, Andy looked over at me and sat up straight.

"What?"

I smiled slightly and held my hand out to him "I want to show you something"

Andy smiled wide, getting up and grabbing my hand.

"Better be good"

"Oh trust me" I laughed slightly, leading him to my room, I turned to him, kissing him softly as I opened the door. Andy pulled away and smiled at my room, his blue eyes lit up.

"What's all this?" He wondered, walking in, I bit my lip, closing the door behind me as I ran my hands around his back to his hips.

"I just wanted to give you everything..." I breathed, kissing his neck softly, he turned to me and grinned, his hard-on was already apparent. I tried not to laugh.

"Why?"

"Because it hit me that, one day, maybe, one day, something may come up, or things will change and there'll be moments where I'll regret not giving you all I could, I take and take from you whilst you give and give. I-I love you, and I want to spoil you and love you in every way possible" I admitted

Andy's eyes glazed before he huffed a happy laugh

"I love you, Shaun...I-I'm honestly speechless, is that my mixtape?" He asked, I giggled.

"Yep"

He smiled and slowly laid down on my bed, trying to be careful. He honestly looked so much more beautiful in this setting, my nerves were growing. I grabbed the bag of mixed lollies, Andy got more excited.

"Oh boy you know how to please a man"

I opened it and ate a strawberries and cream, passing it to him.

"Want one?"

He grabbed a red snake without question and started eating it. I put the bag down and laid next to him, running my fingers up and down his chest, looking up into his eyes as he stared into mine.

"I'm so nervous" he admitted, I bit my lip

"Same..."

"How do we even begin?" He asked awkwardly, I shrugged, crawling on top of him.

"Maybe we should just, go for it..." I breathed, he smiled, cupping my face as I leaned in, kissing him lightly, his raspberry breath sent me racing, he deepened the kiss, sliding his fingers down my sides to my thighs, I breathed deeply, pulling my shirt off. Andy helped before our lips met again, he rolled me onto my back, making me giggle as I heard the lolly packet hit the floor. Andy snickered with a soft "oops" before pulling his shirt off, kissing my neck slowly as he began to dry hump me, I exhaled, gripping onto his back.

His lips made their way back to mine, this time in a passionate, dominant way, I moaned softly, lightly touching my tongue to his as his warm soft skin trembled under my fingers, running their way to his pants, we both got each other's pants and underwear off, my shaky breath made my lips tremor at the butterflies in my stomach. Andy spread my legs, I smiled softly under him, leaning my hand over, grabbing the condom for him.

I placed it in his hand, kissing him quickly.

"I love you..." I breathed, he kissed me again, getting the condom on.

"W-What will make this easier for you?" He asked, I licked my lips, wrapping my leg around his hips.

"T-try that"

"You sure you want this"

"Shut up" I laughed "I want you, please, Andy..." I yearned slightly, he slammed his lips to mine, and slowly, so slowly, I felt it.

My toes curled, it was such a weird pleasure sensation. I nearly shrieked. Andy slowly made his way in and out, I groaned loudly, wrapping my arms around his neck, throwing my head back.

"F-fuck. I love you. I love you" Andy breathed a moan in my ear as he wrapped his arms around my own, holding me closer as he sped up.

"O-oh fuck"I moaned as the pleasure burned hotter.

Andy smashed his lips back to mine, we kissed more passionate as he got faster, I breathed deeply, his lips holing onto mine only a second longer.

"Andy, I-I'm close" I whimpered, Andy slammed into me as he began to pant, our sweat was sticking us together at this point. He kept going and going, I kept moaning and groaning, I leeched onto him, my lips on his neck as I burned hotter.

"O-oh shit!" Andy cried, moaning aggressively as he thrusted as fast as he could, at this point, I was screaming. Andy let me go, I fell back onto the pillow, panting, whimpering, letting myself go.

"O-oh Andy, don't stop, f-fuck! Yesyesyesyesyes" I inhaled sharply, Andy pressed his head to mine, our eyes looking into each other lustfully as I came, only seconds later, Andy shivered and moaned.

"O-Oh g-god..." He breathed deeply as he came to a stop, I giggled, wiping the sweat off his forehead, running my fingers through his hair.

"Not quite"

He pulled out, collapsing next to me.

"T-that was so good" I huffed, smirking over at Andy.

"It really was" he smiled admiringly as he ran his fingers through my hair.

"I love you"

"I love you so much" I smiled, leaning over, planting a kiss on his lips as I smirked.

"How about a nice shower, sweaty bum?"

"Sounds good to me"


	14. Chapter 14

Being completely not a virgin is great, I mean, at first it hurt for a week, but then it gets so good. Almost every time me and Andy are alone, we have sex, and it's just raw and passionate and he fills me up with so much joy and every time he kisses me I feel like the world doesn't exist, that he is my world, he keeps me grounded...but when he stops, I realise something, at any moment, he's going to leave and the rain will kiss my broken lips. I wish I could've done a better job at tutoring him.

I showed up at Andy's to hear his mum yelling. Fuck, was all I could think, I ran and knocked on the door loudly.

"FUCK YOU!" I heard Andy shout

Andy opened the door, walking out without even looking at me, I followed him

"A-Andy?"

He kept walking down the road, I grabbed his wrist, he turned to me and just started breaking down, I wrapped my arms around him tight, in shock. I didn't know this would be his reaction, he sobbed into my shirt and smelled heavy of beer.

"I want to run away" he cried

"What happened?" I asked, he sniffed, mumbling against my chest.

"I didn't pass. Dad wants me to stay with him for four months to study"

"Oh fuck, baby..." I squeezed him tighter, then realised that was the first time I called him that.

"Worst part is, I won't have you." He slurred, he was at least tipsy and I didn't care

"We can make it last, o-or make it easier"

"How?" He sniffed, looking at me, I wiped his eyes

"We can have a break, so you don't have to worry about me, I'll be right here when you get back" I suggested

"Get fucked" he huffed, turning away from me, I followed him.

"Andy you know that's not what I meant-"

"Fuck off! I don't need this shit"

I stopped walking, feeling my heart drop to my feet.

"W-Where are you going?" I asked

"None of your fucking business" he yelled, walking fast with his head down low, I walked the opposite way, furious.

I got home and slammed my bedroom door, screaming as loud as I could. My eyes welled up as I felt myself break, for the first time in months. I kicked over my desk chair and punched my wall before I jumped onto my bed, sobbing into my pillow.

And I think this was the first night in a while where I cried myself to sleep. I felt real heartache, hurting in every part of my body. I don't mean to over dramatise, but fuck, I love Andy so much, this is so unfair. I just want him to hold me right now. I missed him.

I had flashbacks all night, to the day we met.

The first "I think I'm in love with you" till the last

The first "I know I'm in love with you" till the whispered "I love you's" as we fell asleep, each moment we laughed, held each other, made sure we were happy. I miss him

I miss him

I need him

I love...

I opened my eyes the next morning, the smell of bacon in the air that just made me sick. Then it hit me, I fucked up.

I got up, got clothes on and brushed my teeth, leaving without saying a word. I jumped on a bus and a train, quickly getting to Andy's.

I walked up his driveway with so much adrenaline. I needed him, I want him, I love him.

I knocked three times on the door, no one seemed to be home, but I knocked harder.

I heard the door unlock and once opened, I could feel Andy staring at me through the screen.

He slowly unlocked the fly screen door, opening it, I bit my lip as sudden anxiety clouded me, he looked like a ruin, still beautiful, but broken.

"Hey" Andy spoke without enthusiasm as he scratched his neck, letting me in

"Hey" I walked in and looked at him.

He began walking to his kitchen, where I followed carefully, he was acting normal, dull, but normal. Packed boxes and a few bags traced the hallway, he packed so quickly.

"Nearly finished packing huh?" I asked, Andy had a sip of his drink, nodding as he placed it back on the counter.

"It's only a couple months though, I can live"

"But I can't see you..." I spoke softly, approaching him, he laughed a shaky breath.

"You? You broke up with me"

"I didn't! I said that it'd be easier!" I raised my voice, Andy stepped back, looking at me as if he were disgusted.

"Easier? Shaun! Does it look like this could get ANY easier, fuck sake, you leaving me makes it HARDER, I gave my all to you, then I find out this shit and you left me!?" He got closer to me, bringing his voice more stern as he poked my chest, I felt a tear roll down my cheek "and don't just think that that night meant nothing for me because I'm the one who jabbed it in you. You made me vulnerable, I let you have all of me, and as usual, you just took it..."

I didn't know what to do with the fury in my stomach and ache in my heart. I grabbed his face and slammed my lips to his, Andy grabbed my waist, lifting me up onto the counter, our lips kissing with so much sloppiness as he pulled mine and his shirt off, I began to undo my pants, Andy's fingers dipping hard into my hips as his lips made their way to my collar bone, I shimmied my pants off, kicking my shoes off along the way as I unzipped Andy's pants.

Andy bit my neck, thrusting up into me, I let out a shriek, my fingers gripping onto his hair, Andy thrusted hard over and over as I gasped, moaned and held onto him for life as he fucked me against the counter.

"H-How dare you-" I groaned loudly as he got deeper "fuck!-think I used you for this, I gave you just as much" I whispered, Andy pulled my head back by my hair, getting faster, I cried out, beginning to play with myself fast.

"And how dare y-you speak like that whilst we're fucking" he spoke aggressively

I leached back onto him, panting as I felt myself get closer, Andy pulled out randomly, orgasming in my ear as he shivered, collapsing on me against the counter. His cum was all over me, I scoffed, pushing him off.

"You better finish me off" I threatened with a smirk, Andy pulled me down by his hands, getting on his knees.

"Oh fuck!" I moaned, almost thrusting into his mouth. He was so good at it, if have no clue how.

I threw my head back, feeling myself release, an aching orgasm come from my throat. Andy pulled away, getting up without saying a word and just started putting his clothes on.

Once I finally looked decent again, I went to his room where he was packing the last of his stuff. I sighed and leaned on the door frame, he was making me so mad now.

"So that's it, a quick fuck and ditch? What happened to being vulnerable" I accused, Andy turned to me

"Fuck you Shaun"

"Just did" I smiled, walking to him

"I love you"

"Stop. You're just trying to make me feel better" he mumbled, going back to packing, I grabbed his wrist.

"No look, I love you so much, I thought it'd be easier being without you whilst you stayed at your dad's for the next four months but no, it's harder..." I pressed my head to his shoulder "spending one night without you is harder..."

Andy turned back to me with a sniff

"Then what do we do?"

"Call me every night?-"

"Doubt that'll happen"

"I-I'll come on weekends-"

"I have to study"

"Holidays"

"Do you not get it Shaun? We're going to drift-"

"Oh, says the one who hates me for saying it's easier-"

"Fuck off! It's-it's just that, I'm scared you'll find someone new"

I shook my head "shut up Andy, you're more likely to do that than me"

Andy looked away from my eyes

"Exactly"

"Stop making me sound so bad, Shaun. I love you, okay? I fucking love you" his eyes met mine again, I scratched my lip

"Then we should get back together, and if something happens in those four months, then we'll know if we love each other or not..."

"Yeah, okay" Andy agreed, I smiled and kissed him softly, Andy, as always, held onto my lips longer as I pulled away.

"I-I better let you continue or whatever"

"You should stay, since I'm leaving tonight"

I felt my heart sink "tonight?"

"Yeah" he sighed, I wrapped my arms around him, closing my eyes. I was already missing him, and he was here in my arms, his hand rubbing my back.

"It might not be four months, if I piss my dad off"

"Huh?"

"Why do you think I live here and not with dad? I annoy him, no matter how proud he is or whatever, he ends up kicking me out"

"What a dick"

"Yeah I reckon-but hey, how about we have sex and cuddle in bed for the next few hours?" Andy smirked, I laughed "I flipped you like a switch and turned you into a rabbit"

"Cuddling sex sounds nice though"

I shrugged "I guess so" I smirked

And that's what we did for the next hour, we just cuddled naked in bed and talked as if it were just another day, with tender kisses in between.

"This sucks" I sighed

"I know..."

I looked into his eyes with a sad smile "I'm going to miss your blonde hair and blue eyes" I admitted

"I'm going to miss your chocolate coloured hair and cute as fuck smile" he replied, I smiled wide, grabbing his hand.

"I'm going to miss these hands, this body being tangled with mine between sheets"

Andy kissed my shoulder with a shaky breath.

"I'm going to miss the boy I fell in love with at the rock show" I added

"I love you Shaun" he told me, for the fifth time in this hour.

"I love you, Andy" I said back, as I did every time, followed with another tender kiss.

Andy chuckled "god when did we get so cheesy"

"When we got too intimate and your dad ripped you away from me" I spoke with harsh honesty, looking in Andy's eyes, he pouted.

"Well you got me now, and forever" he smiled, kissing me passionately as he rolled me over, kissing down my chest slowly before looking up at me, his cheeks flushed a little, I smiled.

"What?"

"R-Remember when I said that I always imagined it you doing me? I-I was wondering if you could..."

"Could what?" I smirked with a chuckle

"The words 'fuck me' are used to lightly so...I'd say, make love to me Shaun. All whilst we can. Leave a mark on me to remember you by"

I smiled, the way he romances gives me so many butterflies

"I can't make a hickey that lasts four months"

"Shaun. You know that's not what I mean"

"Just shut up and kiss me" I breathed, cupping his face, pulling him back up so our lips could collide in a powerful force.

This felt different, my fingers trailed over his torso, each inch of his slim, smooth body, tasting his lips so carefully, longingly, I never wanted to let go. Andy sighed on my lips, his fingers trailing up my thighs.

I rolled him over, kissing him slowly, my tongue daring to collide with his, I began to kiss down his chest slowly, his skin tasted so beautiful, he smelt like vanilla and cinnamon. I made my way all the way down, kissing his length softly as I looked up at him, he bit his lip, combing his fingers through my hair. I crawled back up, our lips colliding again as I grabbed the condom from the bed side drawer.

Andy grabbed it off me, getting it on for me as I kissed his neck, deeply, my tongue pulsing as I sucked hard, pulling away only to leave the biggest masterpiece on Andy's neck, along with a moan coming from his parted lips. He spread his legs for me, kissing me deeply, always holding on a second longer, I pulled away and watched his actions as I slowly thrusted my length into him, he exhaled, gripping onto my back. I loved being dominant, it turned me on so much, this feeling. I think I could enjoy this.

I started off slow, making sure he was okay, his face only begged for more, so I pushed deeper.

"F-fuck yeah..." Andy breathed, pushing his head into my chest, I wrapping my arms around him, kissing his shoulder as I sped up.

"Oh Shaun!" Andy whimpered as I continued, faster, faster, faster.

Suddenly Andy pinned me down, moving up and down, I groaned, my eyes in shock as his hips swayed and moved so beautifully, I ran my fingers over his hips, his fingers gripped into my chest, panting as he got faster, moving up and down.

Andy began to slip, I sat up and grabbed onto him, he held onto me, kissing my lips as I slammed into him over, and over again. He threw his head back, letting out a loud moan, I pinned him back down, grabbing his hips as I slammed into him, my hips gaining a mind of their own.

"Oh Shaun!" He whimpered "right there baby, right there" he told me with so much passion, throwing his head back as he gripped onto the pillow. I felt myself build up, I was panting now, I cupped his face, pressing my head to his as I kept going, beginning to shiver, Andy looked up in my eyes so lovingly as he jacked himself off.

"Oh!" Andy cried as I slammed hard, once more, a soft orgasm leaving both our lips, he shivered, we slowed down to a stop, kissing each other deeply, Andy, again, always holding on for longer.

"I-I love you" he sniffed, I smiled, wiping his eye gently with my thumb.

"I love you too..."

Three knocks came at the front door as we finished getting changed, I ignored it.

"How did you enjoy that so much?" I wondered, he took it so much better than I did. Andy grinned and blushed, biting his lip.

"Uhhh-"

"Andrew!" His mum called out.

"Shit!" He panicked, grabbing his lynx, spraying the both of us without my consent.

He walked out, me one step behind him.

It was his father. How much time exactly went by?

"Hey son, hey Shaun" he smiled, his crows feet defined. I had nothing against John, kind of felt bad for him. Andy was the only one out of all his siblings who didn't visit his dad. Hopefully this will patch things up for them.

"Hey" I smiled slightly

"Hey dad" Andy rubbed his neck anxiously. I guess this was it.

I helped Andy get all his stuff into the car.

"You won't give up on me?" Andy asked as I closed the boot, I smiled.

"As long as you don't give up on me, dude"

"I won't" he promised, I kissed his cheek softly.

"It's only four months or something, we'll be okay."

"That depends" his father butt in, I looked at him confused.

"What do you mean?"

"If Andy doesn't do good in the first term, he'll be staying with me for the year to complete year 12 AGAIN, as he just failed to pass year 12. Then hopefully we can get him into uni" he spoke so proudly of this, I was dying inside. I was going to lose him. Andy just stared at the ground, I can't even imagine what he's thinking "don't worry, you can visit on school holidays"

But that's not enough time

"Yeah" was all I could really say

John got in the car, me and Andy squeezed each other tight. I was trying so hard not to cry.

"I know I'm in love with you..." Andy whispered, I squeezed tighter, pressing my head against his shoulder, letting myself cry now.

"I love you, I love you, I love you" was all I could push out with a sniff. I looked at Andy, he was holding back tears, but he wiped mine with a positive smile, kissing me slowly, tenderly, holding me by the waist as my hands cupped his jaw, this time, we both held on that second longer, going in for another kiss.

"Come on Andy!" His dad called out. He held on a bit longer before pulling away, we smiled at each other before he got in that car, I wiped my eyes, standing back as the car pulled out, Bradie came over, putting his hand on my shoulder, I looked at him.

"You okay?"

"Yeah...he said he'd email and send letters...we can do this"

"I know you can. Come, stay for dinner, We can play mario kart? I'll let you win I promise"

I chuckled and sniffed. Bradie was a good best friend. His brother just left and he's more focused on everyone else.

"Sure, not prepared to go home anyway"


	15. Chapter 15

I didn't get to go visit Andy over Christmas, we ended up going to Tasmania for a holiday and it killed me. Andy and I didn't really speak, just as we feared, maybe a letter every month? So around about 9 letters, I'm not sure. But by this point, I was sure he was over me and had found a girlfriend. I was 18 next week, and he was coming down tomorrow. I'm actually so nervous I could cry. I've missed him so much and Bradie tells me constantly that Andy misses me too.

Bradie and I are best mates but he has a girlfriend so he's been hanging with her a lot more, which doesn't bother me, I guess. I'm pretty close with Andy's friends but it's kind of weird when they hear more from andy than I do, and I'm his boyfriend. I'm just hoping he hasn't changed much and is still the Andy I fell in love with a year ago.

Gerald and Andy's mum came by the next morning, I smiled slightly

"Hey, Bradie forget something?"

"No, I actually came for your mum, but I also have someone here for you" his mum smiled and moved from the doorway, I found Andy standing there, on my driveway, his hair was a bit longer and swooped, he smiled at me so wide I felt my heart almost fall out of my chest, I ran up to him and wrapped my arms around him, he laughed and hugged me tight.

"Hey stranger, miss me?"

"I missed you so much" I whispered, pressing my face into his neck where he ran his fingers up and down my back, causing me to shiver.

"I missed you too"

"You need a ride home later?" Gerald asked, Andy looked at him and shook his head

"Nah, I'll get a train"

I sniffed, holding back my happy tears as I pulled away from him.

"Okay kiddo, you need some cash?" He asked, giving Andy a 20 anyway.

"No ones home by the way, they went out to lake haven for lunch. I slept in"I added

Andy's mum laughed, her eyes crinkling

"That's fine love, I'll call her later tonight"

"Okay" I smiled, looking at Andy who was looking at me with those eyes, adoring every inch of me, the butterflies in my stomach were going insane.

They said goodbye and drove away, Andy instantly slammed his lips to mine, backing me into the garage door, I breathed deeply in shock as he seemed so hungry, holding onto me so tight, my fingers clamped in his hair as I kissed him back, I felt a bit faint since there was no air between us. Andy kissed me once more, holding on a second longer as he did with a smile, making me feel absolutely like those 10 months never happened.

"I love you" Andy breathed, I pressed my head to his.

"I love you"

It had been so long since I last heard his voice or saw him and the electric tension between us was too much. I wanted him to finish what he started outside.

We smirked at each other as we found ourselves alone in the lounge, I automatically started taking my shirt off, Andy pushed everything off the coffee table as I pulled my pants down, jumping on top of it, his eyes were wild with passion as his lips hit mine, I pulled his shirt off as he unzipped his pants, thrusting into me hard, I clung onto him tight as he thrusted at a hard even pace, I was gasping, I had missed this so much, I kissed his neck with my tongue passionately, sucking lightly. I was so full of this need for Andy and now I had him, his fingers lost in my hair as he filled me with bliss.

"Oh fuck yes" I exhaled, moaning loudly. "Oh fuck I love you" I breathed.

"Love you more" Andy smirked, beginning to speed up, causing me to whimper in pleasure

"Oh shit!"

Which soon turned into fear as I heard the front door open

"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!" I pushed Andy off and pulled my pants back up as he zipped his pants, quickly putting on his shirt, as did I.

Step by step my family came up the stairs.

"Hey boys" mum smiled at us, dad nodded, Liam didn't even bother to look at us whilst Luke smirked, noticing our flushed cheeks and heavy breaths. I looked down, Andy cleared his throat as he grabbed his shoes.

"Are you staying for dinner Andy? Your mum called saying you just got back, you must be hungry" My mum asked, Andy shook his head.

"Nah, I better head back home. Thanks though"

I looked at him with such disappointment "I'll walk you down"

"Okay" he replied softly

"Well that's too bad, we're having stir fry! Well, see you around"

"Yeah, thanks mrs div" he smiled, putting his shoes on as he hopped outside, I followed.

"Why can't you stay the night?" I asked, grabbing his hand, he sighed.

"I feel like your dad doesn't like me, and I was just fucking you on a coffee table-look, I just got back from dad's which was like a nightmare. I don't know, I just need to rest"

I slammed my lips to his, gripping onto his hair, he wrapped his arms around my waist as he kissed me back deeply, causing my heart to flutter, he held onto the kiss as I pulled away.

"I miss you so much" my voice shook, he placed a kiss on my forehead

"I love you Shaun, never forget that. Remember, I'll be back tomorrow"

"Yeah and maybe you can finish what you started" I sniffed, chuckling. Andy looked into my eyes as if he adored me, I missed that look, all those months without communication and I still loved him.

"I will make it up to you, I swear. We'll catch up and everything"

I pouted slightly, I didn't like how he was leaving again.

"Wait, you're 18 next week" he realised, I shifted my eyes in confusion

"Yeah and?"

"And, I'm going to make you lose your drunk virginity tonight, get you ready, your birthday weekend will be awesome"

"Really?" I spoke excited, a wide smile on my face.

"Yep! Go get ready and we'll head to Shannon's."

I kissed him quickly and ran inside, refreshing myself quickly and grabbing my phone and wallet.

"Won't be home for dinner mum! Going to a friends!"

"Shaun!-"

I shut the door and ran out to andy, he grabbed my hand and ran up the road with me, both of us laughing as we did so, once we reached the corner we were puffed, so we began to walk.

"How's living with dad?" I asked, andy shrugged.

"Average. Kind of like living with myself, you'd think it'd be fun, but it's not after a while. Only 5 months and I can move back here, that's if I don't get into Melbourne University"

"You going to Melbourne?"

"Well my sister goes there and claims it's great, so I'll probably move there" he stated, I looked down at our hands.

"What do you plan on doing there?"

"Something to do with the arts and music probably"

"I was thinking of going to uni, but there's no way I'd be allowed to go to Melbourne" I sighed, andy rubbed his thumb against the back of my hand.

"Hey, stop thinking about the future..."

"I can't though, I thrive for it" I looked him in the eye "I thrive for the future I could have, making music, living and travelling with you...and you know, being a couple"

"We're being a couple right now"

"Then what are we when you're not here?"

"Please, please stop talking like that" he cupped my face, I couldn't look him in the eye anymore.

"I am so in love with you Shaun, I missed you so much. I barely wrote or called because I had nothing to say, just I miss you, because day after day at my stupid school-it's just like how it was before you, I'm sick of it. I miss you, Shaun. I love you" he breathed, kissing my lips gently, I had no idea how to respond.

"Now please, just for the next couple weeks, forget about the past and future and focus on right now" he pleaded, pulling away from me, I nodded and held his hand as we walked.

He didn't seem to want to talk about what was going on whilst he was gone, nor did he want to know anything about me. He acted as if those months never happened, as if he never left my side, as if we were happy and in a healthy relationship. I don't know what you call this anymore. I shook any doubt in my head, the thought of losing him killed me.

We showed up to Shannon's with 4 bottles of vodka and whiskey andy brought, along with soft drinks to mix them with. This felt kind of strange, considering that I was underage and have only had one beer, ever.

"You got shot glasses?" Andy asked from the kitchen, looking through cupboards.

"Yeah. They're there somewhere" Shannon replied, focusing on the video game he was playing, I bit my lip.

"Shots? Really?" I said with displeasure, Andy put three shot glasses on the counter with a smile.

"We drink to get drunk"

We clinked our vodka shots, the boys easily shot it down whilst I did it with hesitation, the vodka burning my mouth all over. Who knew it felt like warm acid crawling through my lungs, but I enjoyed it.

So I did another shot

And another

And one more

Before Andy took the glass off me with a laugh.

"You feel anything yet?" He asked, I shook my head and giggled

"Nope"

Andy smirked and gave me a whiskey and coke to enjoy, and I really did enjoy it.

Once I had three cups of that, it really settled in, things were getting blurry and felt a bit unreal, I touched my neck and it felt really nice and I kept stroking it, for no real reason at all.

"Well I'm heading to bed, you guys have fun, remember to lock the door behind you as you leave" Shannon laughed, taking one more shot as he walked off to bed

"Goooooodnight Shannon" I giggled, laying on the couch, looking at the ceiling. This was so awesome.

Andy put on a cd and turned it up, I stood up immediately with a gasp.

"Madonna?! Really!?"

Andy chuckled, turning up the volume, he grabbed my hands and started making me dance, to Like A Virgin, I jumped on the couch and sing at the top of my voice

"I MADE IT THROUGH THE WILDERNESS! SOMEHOW I MADE IT THROUGH! DIDNT KNOW HOW LOST I WAS UNTIL I FOUND YOU!"

I jumped on Andy, we tumbled back onto the floor where Andy laughed, I kept singing, running my finger down Andy's chest.

"I was beat! Incomplete! I'd been had, I was sad and blue but you made me feel, yeah you made me feeeeel, shiny and neewwwwww!"

I jumped up, Andy catching my hands as he wobbled back to a standing position.

"LIKE A VIRGIN!" We both screamed, Andy yanked me close, I smirked as we swayed our hips together, head to head. God, he was hot.

"When your heart beats next to mine..." He sung softly, I breathed against Andy's lips, I felt his breath shake, his fingers trailing up and down my lower back. I wanted him so bad.

"Shannon!" His mum suddenly called out.

"Shit!" Andy said softly, grabbing my hand and before we knew it, we were running out the back door, Andy jumped over the fence, I think. I was so confused.

"Grab my hand Shaun!" Andy persisted, his hand held out to me

"Why can't we just go say hi?" I asked

"Because if we get caught they'll tell your mum!"

"Oh fuck!" I laughed, grabbing his hand as he helped me over.

We ran down the street fast, but the longer I ran, everything slowly went so blurry that I was seeing twos of everything, I dropped on my hands and knees, I was getting cold sweats. Oh no.

"Shaun?" Andy was confused. "Shaun!" He laughed, running back over to me, he crouched down, a hand on my back. "You alright?"

"Shauny not feeling so good" I groaned, crawling to the house in front of me's lawn.

I kinda blacked out for a second and looked down to find a pool of vomit. And thus, I felt myself begin to get sober, everything that happened drunk started to fade. I was so confused.

"You alright?" Andy seemed concerned, helping me up, I nodded.

"Yeah...man that was weird"

"You puked. You're a pussy" he smirked, I nudged him. "Fuck off"

"Come on" he held his hand out to me "let's go to mine and clean you up"

I smiled and grabbed his hand, linking our fingers as we took the longest walk to his place.

"I feel bad for that persons lawn" I pouted, my stomach felt nothing but guilt now.

"You should feel bad, I had to watch you throw up." Andy winked at me, I laughed.

"You know it's true love when you've seen them throw up and you still think they're hot" I giggled, Andy laughed as we walked up the driveway.

"Yeah who knew I found such a looker"

I smiled as we went inside.

After I freshened up, I laid on Andy's bed in some of his clothes, his room was so empty now, it was just us, laying on his bed. I rested my head against his chest, Andy stroked my hair gently, I sighed, the warmth of him was so comforting, I never wanted him to leave.

"How's school?" Andy asked, I shrugged in his arms

"Okay I guess. I'm passing, Bradie has a girlfriend so we don't talk much and Scott still gives me shit but eh, I can manage"

"I'm sorry to hear that, it's about the same for me, I mean I have friends but they're just party buddies, really. At school they smoke and all that gross shit and I can't handle that"

"You better not ever smoke" I was not amused, I looked at him, he quickly licked his lips.

"I tried it, and it sucked. I find it disgusting so no, I'm not going to be a smoker"

I kissed him softly and smiled "good"

Andy laid his head back down on the pillow, I just looked up at him with so much admiration. He was still gorgeous.

We decided to watch Mean Girls in the lounge, the same movie we saw on our first date, i never realised how far we've come and how things were changing. I never missed anyone the way I had missed him. He was laying down next to me, his head propped up on my chest, his hair smelt so nice of green apple conditioner. I just smiled, I had Andy back, my hand on his waist, watching a movie, the way we should be.

I began wondering back to when he found out, and what we shared before he left, I smirked a little because that sex had kept me going. So I just had to ask.

"Hey?"

"Mmm?" Andy hummed, looking up at me.

"Remember when we had sex?"

"Which time? He asked with a laugh, sitting up and ruffling his hair, I licked my lip, sitting up.

"The time before you left, when I did you"

"Oh" Andy giggled softly "what about it?"

"How were you so comfortable with it, you completely blew me away with that"

"Haha, 'blew me away'" Andy sniggered, using quote fingers and everything.

"Shut up!-I'm just wondering"

"What? You think I had sex with other boys before you?"

"No! That's not what I'm saying at all"

Andy stood up and held his hand out to me with a smirk, I raised an eyebrow

"What?"

"Come"

And so I did, grabbing his hand whee he took me to his room, closing the door behind us. I took a seat on the end of the bed. Andy began to rummage through his old things.

"You see this?" Andy grinned, showing me what seemed to look like a hairbrush handle, my eyebrows raised. Wait a second.

"Oh my god"

"Yep" he blushed with a sly smile before biting his lip. "When I turned sixteen I wanted to know the feeling...so I brought a hair brush because you know, the rims feel nice I guess and yeah" he laughed awkwardly, I couldn't contain my grin.

"You are so sexy"

"Really?"

"Yeah, lay down" i said with a slight demand, grabbing the handle off him as he obeyed, I kissed his lips softly before kissing his neck, my hand trailing down his pants where I grabbed his bulge, I could feel him start to harden. I couldn't stop grinning.

I made my way down his chest, kissing his hip bone slowly as I pulled his pants down. He helped kick them off, instantly spreading his legs for me. I kissed the tip of his dick, lightly running the purple handle against his hole, he exhaled, his eyes melting in mine causing my stomach to fill with lust and a big need to make him scream, I started sucking the head of his dick, pumping with my other hand.

I'd run my tongue around him, swallow him whole, he'd moan a yearn for pleasure and I kept going, up and down as fast as I could. Andy grabbed my head, inhaling sharply as he bucked his hips.

"Fuuuuck, when did you get so good?" He asked with surprise, I pulled my mouth away and dragged my tongue up his shaft, pushing the handle in slowly, andy gripped onto the sheets, I could feel him tensing around me, I bit my lip as he threw his head back.

"You could say I did some research" I snickered, taking him into my mouth again, moving slow with both my mouth and handle, Andy was moaning so loud I could hardly contain myself.

I thrusted the handle faster, moving it in a twisting, circular motion.

"Oh fuck!" Andy whimpered, gripping my hair, I looked up at him, his intense eyes shined deep in mine, I kept going anyway.

Andy smashed his lips to mine, beginning to take my clothes off. I continued to fuck him hard with the handle as he did so.

"S-Shaun-" his voice ached, pushing into my chest. "Fuck me..." He breathed, and so I pulled it out, helping him rid of my clothes, he got the condom on me and threw his top off as he sat on my hips, I gasped as I felt myself go into another world. I grabbed Andy's face and kissed him hard as he rode me at an even pace, swivelling his hips in a motion where I couldn't help but moan under his lips, his hands looped in the nape of my neck.

He bit my bottom lip lightly to exhale as I held his hips, making him move so slowly that I was throbbing so much I was going to explode. I pinned him down, thrusting as hard and fast as I could, a whimper of pain coming from my lips as I felt it work my core, Andy began to pant and groan, I pushed my head into the crook of his neck.

"H-Holy fuck I love you" he breathed as I slammed into him, over and over again.

He pushed me back down, I smirked as he went all out. I watched him move up and down me so fast my insides were burning up and ready to scream. Beads of sweat began to form on Andy's forehead as he panted and begged for more, I grabbed his hips and rolled him over, fucking as fast as I could and holding on as tight as I could because we were hanging off the side of the bed.

"Oh fuck!" I cried as my climax burned bright, Andy grabbed my neck, looking in my eyes as he began to climax with me. I kept going for as long as I could hold it, Andy was about to fall off the bed, so I yanked him up, holding onto his sweaty body against mine as I continued, our heavy breaths, pants and moans could probably be heard from a mile away.

"Fuck yes Shaun right there baby" Andy exhaled, moving faster, and fast enough that I couldn't stop thrusting back, my climax was only around the corner. Andy cried out my name, eyes clenched shut and that was enough for me

"A-ah fuck! Yes Andy ohh..." I slowly came to a stop as I thrusting once more with a shiver as I came, Andy collapsed onto the bed with a heavy breath. He never came?

I quickly went down on Andy, sucking as hard and fast as I could, deepthroating, licking the head over and over and it was only seconds before Andy had reached it, his fingers in my hair as his back arched, crying out a whirlwind of an orgasm.

"O-oh yes! Yes! Oh!" He cried as he came, I slowly came to a stop, swallowing the load, I pulled away and exhaled, quenched. I smirked up at Andy who was breathless.

"Holy fuck, I missed you" he laughed, I crawled back on top of him.

"I missed you more and besides, I feel like you needed that"

"Oh you bet" he giggled, kissing me softly, always, still, holding a second more.

"I love you" he whispered

"I love you" I replied, kissing him once more.


	16. Chapter 16

18

I am 18

And very, very hungover.

I opened my eyes to find Andy laying next to me, going through the pictures on his phone, I groaned as I looked toward the sun piercing through the curtain.

"Morning sunshine" he chuckled

"Fuck off" I laughed, pushing my face into the pillow.

"You were so smashed last night look" Andy tapped me, I looked at his phone, the light thumping my head as I saw a photo of me flashing my butt at traffic.

"Seems about right" I huffed.

"What do you remember?" Andy asked, I rolled onto my back and looked at him, pondering.

"I remember the dinner party, then we headed to beachie with everyone, I remember dancing...falling...clinging onto you...we made out a lot and I think I threw up-"

"On Bradie"

"Oh really? Shit" I laughed, I felt terrible.

"It was a good night though. Happy Birthday, again"

"Yeah, yeah" I covered my face with my hands and yawned loudly. I was so fucked.

"Now how about we go out and get Maccas for lunch"

I felt instantly repulsed. Ew

"Or maybe fish and chips, some potato cakes...head down to kfc"

"Oh fuck you. Ugh" I groaned, my stomach churned at the thought.

Andy laughed as if he were an evil genius before kissing my forehead.

"I love you"

"Yeah I love you too" I mumbled

"Hey, cheer up, I'm leaving tomorrow morning"

I snapped my head to Andy. What.

"Since when?"

"Since always? Don't you remember?"

"No. And frankly, I don't want you to leave"

"I can't stop my dad from picking me up!"

I sighed and pushed my head back into the pillow, I didn't want him to go, I could almost cry. It's going to be like the last 10 months but worse.

"Hey.." Andy's soft voice ringed in my ear as he wrapped his arm around my waist, kissing my shoulder.

"I promise I'll be back"

Yeah, that's what someone who won't be back says.

"Shaun..."

I sniffed, rolled over and faced him. He pulled me into his chest and just held me there. I felt at peace, but something in me knew I was wrong.

"I hate goodbyes"

"Then we'll never say it"

But here I was, saying goodbye again. A deep kiss followed by a soft "I love you" before he left again.

And here I was

Alone

I could get this shit sorted, I could convince my parents to move us where he is, get me into Melbourne uni. I could do this. I could, but I wouldn't be allowed. No way would I be allowed.

At the first day back of school, I sat in my chair, scribbling little characters and trippy art as a guy walked in, he was around Andy's height, he looked tougher, he had muscles, brown hair and green eyes with perfect lips. I would drool over him, if he didn't look so straight.

"This is Cole, he's joining us for the rest of the semester"

I raised an eyebrow, he nodded at me, I widened my eyes and looks back at my book. What a dickhead, he seems to self absorbed.

"Hey" I heard Scott's whisper, I looked over at him.

"How's the gay sex?"

"Better than anything you're getting"

"Missing your homo?"

"Fuck off!"

"Aye" cole's rough voice came from behind me, we looked at him.

"Stop going off at him for who he's fucking and do your work. Fuck, I didn't get expelled and moved schools for nothing you know"

I looked around the room, why was this happening.

"What? You gay too?" Scott teased, Cole's look brooded.

"What's your name?"

"Scott"

"Well, Scott, I don't like you. So shut the fuck up before I punch your face in" he threatened, his fist hitting the table.

I bit my lip, boy was I going to tell Andy about the raggedy man from class.

"What you looking at?" He questioned me, I turned my head right away and worked on my advanced English. That's another thing, how can he look and act how he is and be smart enough for advanced English? Blows me away.

I made my way down the corridor, making my way through heaps of people before I stopped, Cole jumping right and front of me.

"Y'gay?" He asked, I shifted my eyes in confusion.

"U-Uh, I guess so?"

"Cool. Wan' fuck?"

"What?" I laughed "don't be absurd. I have a boyfriend"

"And I have a girlfriend"

"Look-"

"Scott told me...he's 19, living with dad, going to uni. Are you really going to see him again?"

I wanted to reply but my throat closed up, Cole smirked.

"The closet ain't a bad place to be, after all" he breathed in my ear, his breath smelled of cigarettes, it turned me on. Oh god, no.

"L-Look" I cleared my throat "I can't cheat. I've...I've been thinking of leaving Andy for a while now because I can't handle the distance, so when I leave him, we can be together" I told him, I told him the one thing that I kept to myself. He raised an eyebrow.

"Only thing is, you'd have to date me, and dump your girlfriend like the bitch she is" I added, he nodded.

"Break up with him tonight, I'll break up with Jade. Meet me here, at the school, 7pm, okay?"

"Isn't the school closed?"

"Of course it is fuckwad. We're going to be dangerous, you seem like you need that." He smirked, walking away. I felt my stomach churn, oh god...what do I do.

As the clock hit six, I still sat at my desk looking at my phone. This cloud of anxiety hanged over me, I thought I was gonna puke.

There was no way me and Andy would work out. He's drifted and changed, he's moving to Melbourne. I love him to death but I don't want to be stuck on this guy for ages with no call. Cole, although I just met him, I feel things could get far with him. He doesn't seem like he'd be getting anywhere soon. I might regret this but god, was it better than being alone.

So I picked up the phone, clicking on Andy's number

It rung for a while, it felt. Till my heart stopped at the single

"Hello?"

"H-Hey Andy it's me"

"Oh hey, can you not call right now? Doing some homework-" which followed by people laughing in the background. This made me think that he's lied...about every single time

"Right, well I need to talk to you, like, now"

He sighed, I could hear him moving "what?"

"So today at school-"

"Shaun I don't have the time for this"

"I met someone"

He stayed quiet

"I met a guy, named Cole. I realised that you've lied to me, and that no matter what, we can't be how we used to be. You're moving to Melbourne for fucks sake! It's not going to work out, as much as I love you, we cannot possibly work out. You won't call, you don't text, you don't send me shit-I-Instead I end up hearing off Shannon that you're good and getting smashed. I'm sick of feeling like shit. I'm-"

"Goodbye Shaun"

Beep...beep...beep

I hung up my phone and threw it down, feeling my heart wrenching sob crawl up my throat. I rested my head on my hand and just cried, I sobbed softly, it hurt so much. 'Goodbye Shaun' what happened to it never being said? What was I to be sorry for when he never tried? I was done, and I missed him. Then it occurred to me.

Cole.

I took a deep breath, wiping my eyes, composing myself. I could do this.

I left, a condom and my phone in my pocket. I was breaking into school.

I arrived at the front of my school at 7. He put out his cigarette, walking towards me.

"Hey short ass" he smirked at me

"Fuck off, you're shorter than me"

"Well, help me over the fence then"

I rolled my eyes and linked my fingers together, he put his shoe on my hand, I began helping him get over.

"Did you break up with her?" I asked, he looked at me confused

"Who?"

"Your girlfriend?" I sighed.

"I never had a girlfriend" he shrugged, my face dropped. You're fucking kidding me. He began to help me over, and once I was over, I almost punched him in the face.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"What?"

"I broke up with Andy!"

"That's good, he was an ass anyway"

"Fuck you" I huffed, walking through the school with him.

"You will be" he smirked.

"Where are we doing it?" I sighed, he went up the steps of the senior corridor. He grabbed a bobby pin from his pocket and started to fiddle with the lock. I tried to focus on what he was doing, because if I didn't, I'd remember Andy and my heart would ache that tiny bit more.

"Supplies closet?"

"Whatever dude..."

He unlocked it and we snuck our way to the supplies closet, he picked that lock and one we both got in, he took off his black tank top, the small window revealed a dim light, showing all his muscles.

"Don't just stand there, take your clothes off"

Once we were naked he bent over, I got the condom on and slowly thrusted into him, he moaned. This guy has had experience, I could tell. I started slow at first, but he kept groaning for me to go faster. So I did.

I grabbed him by the neck, pulling his head up as I slammed into him hard and fast, panting softly.

"Yes fuck!" He groaned, I bit my lip. This wasn't as fun as I thought it'd be, I couldn't focus. He was hot but I just couldn't.

"Oh god right there! Fuck me!" He cried, beginning to climax, I rolled my eyes and began to fake my own orgasm. My boner just wasn't interested, and it's a total turn off when they shout "fuck me" like what the fuck does it look like I'm doing?

Cole collaped back down onto a shelf, I exhaled softly as he came, I quickly pulled out, pulling the condom off and spitting in it to make it look like I did the job. I tied it up and dropped it. Heartbreak makes you rebellious, I guess.

We walked out of the school quiet, he looked me up and down.

"You're good"

"Thanks" I smiled, he bit his lip

"Want to be my boyfriend?"

"Sounds good to me" I kept smiling, I was faking it. It worked. "I'll see you around?" I added

"Yeah whatever" he huffed, walking away. I felt my phone vibrate.

'Really Shaun? Right in front of my friends? Okay look, I tried, I tried a fuckload. I'm sorry I was never enough for you, I'm sorry that my life doesn't revolve around you anymore, I have my own life and shit to deal with. Fuck you, go fuck a guy you just met, whatever, he'll never make you cum like I could :) be aware that you'll miss me and there's NO way in hell I will take you back. I don't tell you shit because I have nothing to say to you, I still don't. I'm kind of happy, you know, throughout my tears I'm laughing because I'm better than any slut you'll ever fuck and I can fuck all the chicks I want! They're all so hot here ha. But hey, your life right? Also know Bradie probably won't talk to you, nor any of MY friends that you're trying to get on your side. Whatever man, live your life, fuck whatever we had, fuck the next male you see. I guess it was all bullshit, the I love you's, the 'fell in love with the boy at the rock show'? Yeah that shit is crap. I loved you and this is how you treat me? Go fuck yourself Shaun, don't reply to this message.

Goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye.

e'

Fuck my life.


	17. Chapter 17

I've been dating Cole for a month, I guess it's okay. Just okay, nothing that bad. But there's only seven rules to dating Cole Jerome.

1. We have to fuck a few times a day

2. Only he bottoms, no switching bullshit

3. He's allowed to fuck girls whilst we're together, apparently it doesn't count because you know, he's not "attracted" to girls

4. No Andy talk

5. No being a pussy

6. No public affection

7. Be rebellious

I guess you could say...it's okay

"Hey pansy" he smirked at me, I smiled slightly. He thinks being Pansexual is a joke, it's hilarious, really.

We were in his house drinking beer. I hated it because his cigarettes were the worst smelling thing to enter my lungs. This relationship was all lust, there was nothing we had in common, he mostly just wanted to play Call Of Duty and fuck. I could handle it, I guess. It was okay.

"Hey Shaun" he murmured, cigarette between his lips.

"Hm?"

"Wanna fuck?" He whispered, smoke blowing in my face, I cleared my throat and grabbed his cigarette putting it out. I then cupped his crotch with a smirk.

"No..."

I proceeded to squeal as he pinned me down, dry humping my crotch as our lips collided, I gripped onto his hair as our tongues twisted and twined, I breathed a soft moan, pushing him off.

"What am I doing wrong?" He asked, I giggled.

"I can't be bothered with the whole thrusting thing" I admitted

"Then what?"

"Suck my dick"

"Fuck off!" He rolled his eyes, I cupped his crotch.

"F-Fine..." He breathed, I grinned in victory as he made his way down. I just closed my eyes and enjoyed every moment. I couldn't lie, he wasn't bad. Within 5 minutes, I was orgasming "fuck!" I cried as I came, shivering as he swallowed my load.

"Don't ever ask me to do that again"

I just smirked as he kissed my lips.

On the bus ride home, I saw Bradie get on, I called out to him.

"Bradie!"

He smiled slightly at me and came over, sitting next to me

"Hey"

"How's things?"

"Good for me, if that's what you're asking."

I stayed quiet, he sighed.

"He's okay, haven't heard from him in a while though, nothing's changed"

I nodded

"I know you regret it, but I see why you did it"

"You do?"

"Yeah, no one should have to put up with distance, especially when you don't hear from them"

"Yeah..."

"Our family doesn't hate you by the way, you did the right thing"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, we love you Shaun. But hey, this is my stop so I gotta go-see ya!" He rushed, getting up and off the bus. I waved bye then looked out the window. What the fuck was my life?

I walked down the corridor with Cole, rolling my eyes at every girl who'd check him out. I wasn't the jealous type and I'd hate to think that I was starting to really like him for the fuckwit he is but I just can't control it, even though Andy is what I think about most of the day.

"What do you got?" He asked me

"English and science"

"Want to wag with me? Go get high at the beach and fuck under the pier?"

I thought about it for a second.

"You can get high, but I'll fuck you" I shrugged. He smirked.

"Come on"

It was unbelievable how easy it was to wag that school. We took the bus (without paying) to the beach and when we got off and sat on the sand,I could only think about that time me and Andy came down here before he left, whilst my boyfriend was blazing up next to me.

I took my shoes and socks off, rolling up my pants and got up, approaching the ocean. There wasn't much of a breeze today, but the water was so cold when my feet touched it, I had to take a step back. I sighed and crossed my arms, looking out at the nice day. I missed Andy.

Cole wrapped his arm around my waist, flicking his finished blunt into the ocean.

"What you trying to do? Get the fishes high?" I commented, he pressed his hard on against my butt, I smirked.

"Shut up"

We went under the pier behind a rock, we kissed passionately, our tongues battling as I groaned, tugging on his short brown hair.

He pulled down his pants, taking them off as I traced my finger over his nipple, he unzipped my pants and smirked at me. I held his leg up, slowly thrusting in. He gasped and held onto me, fingers clasped tight in my hair as I thrusted into him at an even pace.

I often found he let his "tough guy" guard down when we had sex, he seemed so much more natural, I liked him that way.

I began to get faster, he whimpered, pushing his head into my neck.

"O-Oh I'm close"

I held onto his hips, panting as I went as hard and fast as I could, he cried out, tugging on the nape of my neck hard. He was so hot and I just couldn't get jiggy with it.

"Oh! oh Shaun! I love you, I fucking love you" he whispered as he came, I almost started crying, what the fuck Shaun.

He quickly got on his knees, sucking me hard, I don't know how he did it, but he did it good, so good I started fucking his mouth till he choked.

"Oh god Cole..." I moaned as I orgasmed fast, gasping and shivering as he swallowed me hole as I came.

He stood back up and stared at me, I grabbed his face and kissed him hard. I don't love him, I will always love Andrew. I felt so apologetic because I can't say I love him too.

"I-I have to go" I told him, getting my pants back on.

"You fucking serious?"

I went and grabbed my bag

"I'll come by tonight, I swear" I smiled, walking off.

"Fuck off, don't come at all!" He screamed, I felt the need to cry again, but I held it back.

I needed something to be a better distraction. Cole is in love with me, I never wanted that, it's killing me. I don't want him to open a scar that just started to heal. But at this moment, I could only see him as my last hope.

But it wasn't until I got to school the next day to not find Cole anywhere, it made me really freak out. Did he break up with me? Was that what that was?

I'm sorry I'm not in love with you

I walked towards the library to do some research and was stopped to see Cole walking over with a red-head bimbo by his side.

"Cole!" I called out, he came over to me with a fake happy look.

"What?"

"I-I'm sorry about yesterday"

"What happened yesterday?" He acted confused

"You know, you said you loved me and I didn't say it back?"

"What the fuck! Ew bro I ain't no faggot, see this girl? This is Jade, my girlfriend. I don't love you, no one could love you. Worthless, faggoty piece of shit. Go fuck yourself" he spat, walking off with Jade who acted like top shit. I held back the tears as much as I could, I breathed deeply and turned around to find a girl looking at me with an understanding, sympathetic look, she had blonde hair and light green eyes, she was pretty beautiful

"Hey, you okay?"

"I'll be fine" I assured her

"You sure? To me, it looks like you got dumped for a slut" she laughed, I smiled at her slightly.

"Well yeah, sort of"

"Wanna hang out? I promise I won't tell you I love you and leave the next day" she smiled so positively, I shrugged and started walking with her.

"I'm Shaun, by the way" I introduced myself, she kept smiling, looking down at the ground. No one should be allowed to have such a beautiful smile.

"I'm Brooke"


	18. Chapter 18

My silhouette paced through the club, sliding through sweaty hot men, I felt out of this world, so in the moment. I was a bit drunk but that didn't matter, this Friday was every Friday for me. 'Thank God It's Friday' is more than just a work term, it's a term I use in the sense of getting laid, clearly, with a male. Not the girlfriend of 8 years-now fiancé I have at home.

I made my way to the bar and ordered a scotch. I looked over at an attractive man grinding against another. My vision wasn't at its best but he was just another silhouette who's pheromones caused me to want. I knew what I wanted.

I downed the scotch and told the bartender to keep the change

I approached him slowly, sliding between the two of them so it was him and me. I grabbed his ass as his gripped my hair, we breathed deeply as we grinded. God he was hot.

"Hey, you come here often?" He asked, I shrugged.

"Depends"

"On what?"

"Whether the girlfriend is home or not"

He groaned, turning against me so his ass was against my crotch, we continued to move.

"What's your name?" I asked in his ear, he bit his lip.

"Steve, I work here most nights. Tonight is my night off"

"Wanna head to my room?"

"Only if it's quiet and the lights are dim..."

"Well it's your lucky day" I smirked. He turned around and kissed me, reminding me of an ex lover, how he'd always hold on a second longer.

We barged into my hotel room, ripping each other's clothes off fast as we were tumbling and tripping over everything, he got on my bed, I flipped him over and thrusted, he cried out, clinging onto the sheets, I slammed into him aggressively, he even screamed like an ex lover. He bounced and swayed on me as I thrusted in this position, grabbing his length, pumping him as fast as I could as I went.

"Oh fuck yes! Oh yes!" He whimpered as he came, I pulled out as he turned around, sucking me off fast. Fast enough to make me cum.

We both collapsed on the bed and passed out, that was the best quickie I've had in 8 years.

I woke up to the sound of the guy in my shower. I quickly got up and started putting my clothes on. I heard a phone go off that wasn't my text tone. I grabbed iPhone from his jeans to see it was a message from Shannon. That's odd, I know a Shannon.

'Hey man, good to hear you've moved back to the coast! Hope to see you soon :)'

Wait

The teenager in me was having a panic attack. Did I sleep with Andy?

I unlocked his phone and went to his photos and flipped through them. There were a few of one of those sausage dogs I don't know, beach photos, things he posted on Instagram then...some nudes, which I contemplated on sending to myself, but I didn't. Then there it was, ten selfies of Andy, followed by a few snapshots of what a girl said to him, sounded like she was an ex.

Ha fuck. I slept with Andy.

He walked out of the bathroom with nothing on, i started at him, he was like an angel glowing with a bright aura. He proceeded to grab a towel and wrap it around him.

"S-Shaun! It's been so long you...you look good" he tried to small talk me, I threw his phone on his bed.

"Yeah 'Steve' it has been a while. Hey, you charge by the hour or what, do I get a discount for being your ex?!" I acted like a sarcastic bitch, Andy sighed. He was so much more beautiful.

"Once again, not a hooker Shaun...I use Steve so no one can find me after a one night stand...it's been 8 years for fuck sake Shaun can you act normal? Or is this normal for you now?" He questioned, I stiffened.

"I never forgot you" I admitted. Andy walked over to me, his hair was so gorgeous and so were his eyes. He was 27 now, he ages like fine wine.

"I think I'm in love with you" he said softly, I smiled uncontrollably. He hasn't changed.

"I know I'm in love with you" I replied, he chuckled

"No, you don't"

"Fine, then let's go get some coffee and catch up?"

"Okay, I have nothing better to do" he smiled, and my heart was dead set his again.

We headed to the café downstairs from the hotel and sat at a booth towards the back, the warm coffee smell soothed me. I got a coffee and a sandwich, Andy got a milkshake and a croissant. Talk about the difference.

"Remember our band we had?" I asked with a laugh, he nodded

"Yeah, we didn't even make any music" he laughed, scratching his neck.

"Did we ever come up with a name?" I wondered

"Nope"

"Did you ever think of one?" I asked, Andy nodded, sipping his milkshake.

"When I was living with my dad I thought of one. Short Stack"

"Short Stack?" I raised an eyebrow

"Yeah" he chuckled again, picking at his food.

"Maybe somewhere in parallel universe, Short Stack are a thing and are the best band in Australia" I winked

"Ha, seems legit"

"I reckon. Hey, didn't you go to uni? Why are you in Sydney?" I asked, Andy looked at my eyes taking a pause.

"I uh...I failed my degree. I live in Melbourne but I failed and said fuck it, I miss Sydney and my family, I'm coming home"

"We should throw a homecoming party" I smirked, he laughed.

"Yeah right-anyway, what do you do?"

"I did a bachelor in commerce and went ahead with music and arts, took a while, but it's what I wanted."

"Well I'm glad you enjoyed it, what do you do for work?"

"Well I'm trying to do music producing as a side thing, but I work for an accounting agency. Boring work, good pay"

"Then I guess your paying for this" Andy laughed, but he wasn't joking.

"Fine" I smiled "how long have you been back?" I asked, he shrugged and bit his lip as I sipped my coffee.

"A few days? A week? I don't know, I got offered the job at the bar and I needed the money"

"So you fuck guys from bars?"

"No YOU fuck guys from bars, I do my job"

I laughed "right. Hey, do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend?"

"No, I had a boyfriend in Melbourne for a few years but he got clingy and annoying-then I got a girlfriend but she's literally insane so I dumped her before coming back here. I'm hoping she doesn't trash my apartment"

We both laughed before he asked

"Do you...?"

I looked at him and felt suddenly guilty, which I hadn't for the past 3 years I was doing this.

"I uh, have a fiancé actually"

"Really? Oh man congrats...but wait, last night?"

"Don't worry, you aren't the first" I looked down

"Why do you do it?"

"Because I miss men, I guess. I missed you, I love her but...not in the way I love you"

"What's her name?" He asked

"Brooke" I replied faster than I should've, Andy smiled.

"She sounds like a babe...Is her last name Leishman by any chance?"

"Yeah actually" I spoke with confusion.

"Oh shit, our dad's are mates, we're family friends"

"You're joking" my jaw dropped

"Nope. Deadset. I haven't spoken to her in four years...she never mentioned you"

"Yeah I wonder why" I rolled my eyes.

"Hey, let's go back to yours so I can say hi?"

"Sure, if you want"

I drove back home with Andy in the car. It was so strange having him around again. His hair was shaggy and a bit darker, he had a defined 5'oclock shadow with a tan and great muscles. He was so gorgeous I almost couldn't keep my eyes on the road.

I walked him inside my house, I scratched my lip as I watched him look at how wonderfully my house was decorated thanks to my fiancé.

I lead him to the kitchen where Brooke was pouring herself a glass of wine.

"Hey babe" I smiled at her, she kept her head down at the magazine she was reading.

"Hey shaun, where were you last night?"

"I bumped into an old friend, had a few drinks. Say hi" I nudged her, she looked up in total surprise as she saw Andy.

"Andy?"

"Hey" he smiled, she put her glass down and went and hugged him.

"How are you oh my god, I thought you were at uni?"

"I flunked" he laughed, squeezing her. Seeing them like that made me uncomfortable.

"Don't tell dad though, he'll kill me"

"Secrets safe with me" she smiled as she pulled away before leaning over to me, kissing me softly, I looked at Andy who rolled his eyes as I tenderly kissed her back.

"How about you stay for dinner? I'm cooking some beef and asparagus"

"Sounds great Brooke" he smiled, I sat at the counter and just watched them both interact, how she smiled when she have him a beer, how he laughed when she told us a story. I was so uncomfortable. My ex and my fiancé were getting along so well I was almost jealous...of both of them

"Can you show me where the bathroom is?" Andy asked

"Sure, just down the hall, first left" I replied, he smiled and winked at me. I knew what that meant, and I wasn't going to do that.

"Andy?!" Brooke brought to a whisper when he left the room "why would you bring him here. He's your ex"

"Well it turned out you guys are family friends, so I thought heck, you guys should catch up."

She gave me a disapproving look before grabbing her keys.

"I just don't think it's safe for us...I know how you feel about him"

"Baby I promise nothing with happen. I'll tell you if it did and he'd be out of here in a flash"

"He better...I mean I love the guy but he's still crazy about you, I don't know, guess I better prepare for the worst"

"Don't act like that..." I frowned, actually afraid of what would happen if this flipped out of control. I had no idea what I was doing. She kissed my cheek.

"I got to go pick Honey up from my grandparents. Don't have buttsex whilst I'm gone" she spoke jokingly, when I knew she wasn't.

"Okay babe" I laughed "I love you!" I called out as she walked away.

"Love you too!"

"You are a compulsive liar wow" Andy exaggerated as he came around the corner. I grabbed his face and kissed him tenderly, he kissed me again to get a better hold, I sighed in contentment. He was everything I was missing and everything that could turn my world upside down, or back around. I wasn't sure what was what anymore.


	19. Chapter 19

Andy was pretty much living in our guest bedroom by this point. Brooke couldn't handle how messy he was, but I enjoyed it. I enjoyed having him around.

He usually slept in till around 12, even later if he were drunk the night before. Just after Brooke left for work, Andy walked out, casually just making himself a coffee and toast whilst I'll say at the counter, staring. He was so unusual, but so adorable, walking around in his cheap Kmart underwear.

"Hey cutie" I giggled, he looked at me like a little kid angry at his parents.

"Your girlfriend is too loud"

"What do you mean?" I asked, an eyebrow raised.

"I mean the getting up at 6, hair dryers and the radio on by 7, by 8, you're up and you have breakfast and I don't know what you do to make her laugh that loud and squeal but FUCK! Man, by 9 she was out the door and I've had enough"

I smiled, hiding back my laughter.

"I'm sorry"

"You better be" he threatened, sipping his coffee.

I got off the chair and went around to him, wrapping my arms around his waist. I planted a kiss on his soft back.

"How about you come watch me surf today?" I asked, he turned around, confused.

"You surf?"

"Who doesn't when you live on the central coast?"

He went and got his toast, beginning to butter the bread.

"I can surf, by the way" he spoke in a matter of fact tone, mouth full of toast.

"Really? What board you surf?" I asked, he shrugged.

"Dunno, some dodgy one from City Beach"

I stared at him, he seemed to tense.

"What?"

"Go brush your teeth and get clothes on. We're going shopping"

"Shaun you didn't have to do this, really" he whispered in my ear as we looked at the hand-crafted boards.

"Dude, if you're surfing with me, you aren't using a cheap City Beach surfboard."

"You're a cheap City Beach surfboard" I heard him mutter, I looked at him again.

"I love you" he smiled, it gave me a happy funny feeling, I ignored it.

"Mmm, love you too"

Andy picked a pretty good board. About $1000 out of my pocket, worth it though for that smile on his face.

The day turned to shit, so we just got some pizza for lunch and headed back home, I sat on his bed as he looked at his surfboard.

"This is literally perfect Shaun. Thank you" he smiled, putting the board away.

"It's fine. Tomorrow morning, we'll take it for a ride"

Andy jumped next to me on the bed

"Why are you so nice to me?" He wondered, continuing "especially after how we ended..."

I smiled slightly, grabbing his hand, admiring it, stroking the back with my thumb.

"What happened wasn't your fault, you know that right?" I looked at him, he shrugged.

"I-I feel responsible, failing school, moving to dad's, drifting from you-then that guy you got with...I-I just feel responsible" his voice cracked, I cupped his face, looking deep in his eyes.

"Hey, it's no ones fault, your dad tried to make you do something you weren't capable of and something you didn't want to do. I never loved Cole, he just looked like you and I missed you too much"

Andy smiled slightly, blinking away his tears before he kissed me softly, I held onto the kiss this time.

"What caused you and him to break up?" He wondered, I pulled my hands away from his face and laughed.

"We were having sex and uh, he told me he loved me"

Andy laughed at the agony of it "oh shit!"

"Yeah, because fact was, he reminded me of you but he was nothing like you, he was like a tough guy who kept in the closet, he'd say it was okay for him-I mean only him-to fuck chicks because he doesn't run that way so 'technically' it doesn't count as cheating. But he never let me fuck anyone? He was also a bottom, we weren't allowed to switch"

"Holy fuck" Andy huffed in shock "what a dick...you don't miss bottoming do you?" He asked, I shook my head.

"Nah, discovered I really enjoy dominating"

"Good, because I haven't topped in years" he giggled before laying down on the bed.

I leaned over him, my hand slipped it's way to his hip. He smiled at me softly.

"I missed you"

"I missed you too" I smiled back, kissing his lips softly.

We kissed soft and slow, my heart racing as if all my teenage hormones were back. It was so intensely beautiful with Andy. His fingers caught in my hair as we kissed more passionately, I got on top of him, our tongues softly touching, tasting something we had both missed for a long time. Love.

Just as we began to get hot and heavy, i was dry-humping his crotch, causing him to moan until I heard Brooke unlock the front door. I sighed and pulled away. Andy pouted.

"Sorry"

"Nah, I get it" he smiled, I but my lip and kissed him quickly before running out to her.

"Baby!" I smiled welcomely, kissing her quickly before kissing Honey's head, who was in her arm.

"Hey" she giggled, kissing honey and putting her down. I grabbed the bags off her and put them on the bench, putting the dishes away.

"So, how was work?" I asked, she shrugged, tapping the kitchen counter.

"Pretty typical, snip snip snip, dye dye dye, talk talk talk"

"You must be exhausted" I smirked, going around to her back, massaging her shoulders. She moaned softly.

"Terribly." She giggled "are we going on a date night tonight?" She asked, I completely forgot that was tonight.

"Uhh, I don't think so. I'm sorry hey, how about we get Chinese?"

She sighed and turned around

"Let me guess, you've spent all day with him and completely forgot me?"

"I'll make it up to you" I kissed her softly "I promise" I whispered with a smirk, she smiled.

"Hey kids" Andy randomly came out, going to the fridge to grab a beer, only to be unimpressed.

"Hey Brooke, why didn't you get any beer?" He asked.

"Forgot, sorry"

He shrugged and went back to his room, coming out only seconds later with his new surfboard.

"Hey Brooke, look what Shaun got me"

I sipped my whiskey and noticed how unimpressed her face was as he told her everything about it. I knew Andy was trying to set Brooke off, I kind of enjoyed it to be honest.

After we all ate Chinese and went to our rooms, I got comfy in bed as Brooke took off her make up.

"$1000 Shaun? Really? When do you spend that kind of money on me?" She asked, I looked away from my laptop.

"You're kidding me right? Take a look at your Louis Vuitton before you say that again." I remarked, closing my laptop. She finished plaiting her hair to one side before coming over In her silky nightie.

"I'm sorry, it's just, I'm scared that you'll fall in love with him and run away and never look back" she pouted. I licked my lips at the probability before looking in her eyes.

"Brooke. I love you. I don't love Andy. I love you and hope to marry you. Look at that rock on your finger" I laughed, she looked at the shiny engagement ring.

"I love you Shaun"

"I love you" I whispered, she giggled and looked at me. I smiled.

She put my laptop on the ground and got on my lap, I smirked as she kissed my lips, my hands ran up her smooth thighs, up her nightie to her hips. I exhaled as she swayed herself on my crotch as we kissed, I pulled her nightie off, rolling her over and kissing her neck, she giggled and moaned softly as my hand took control, grabbing her breasts, a hand slid down her underwear. She was pretty much ready.

I pulled down my underwear as she did hers, I pressed my head against hers, watching her eyes as I thrusted. Flashbacks of that night with Andy kept me going. If she knew that, she'd be sick. I thrusted at an even pace, her long manicure nails scratched down my back.

I picked her up and pressed her against the head of the bed as I got faster, panting against her lips, I knew she was close because she just got louder...and louder.

"Oh yes Shaun!" She whimpered, grabbing her breasts as I held her hips, pounding into her at all I could. She began to scream, so loud, screaming my name as she orgasmed. I smirked and felt myself cum, I groaned loudly.

Three bangs came from the other side of the wall.

"CAN YOU SHUT UP IM TIRED AND HORNY!" Andy yelled, I laughed

"Shit..." I breathed, Brooke sighed.

"7 minutes in heaven..."

"I'm sorry babe, hey...don't forget to take the morning after pill, may have came early" I laughed awkwardly, she just nodded.

During the night I got up, making my way to Andy's room.

"You alright dude?" I whispered as I walked into his pitch black room, closing the door.

"Oh hello. Yes I'm fine" I heard him sniff and exhale in the 'I'm trying to control my tears' kind of way.

I got under the cover and felt around, Andy giggled, I reached over as far as I could before I heard a thud. Little shit was trying to run from me.

"Ouch" he laughed slightly before getting back in bed, his knee dug into my thigh, causing me to yelp.

"Shit!"

We both started snickering as we found ourselves perfectly in each other's arms.

"What are you doing here Shaun?" He asked

"I'm going to hold you until you fall asleep"

"Then what, leave and go out with your 'before anyone else'"

"Andy, you know you my bae" I laughed softly

"I'm serious though...I hear everything, you guys have good sex"

"I only did good because I thought of you and I didn't last very long...after our make out, they were urging to get out"

Andy chuckled and pressed his head against my chest, sighing.

"I love you Shaun"

"I know I'm in love with you" I whispered, I think I heard Andy begin to cry again, I ran my hand up and down his back.

"It's okay...it's okay Andy, I'm here"

"If I didn't fuck things up. W-we could be getting married, adopting kids and whatever. Travel the world, have an awesome band. There's so much we could've been Shaun" he whined as he cried "I threw it all away because I couldn't stand up to my dad"

"Sh Andy...you're with me now, that's what matters"

He nodded and sighed.

"I'll get used to this eventually..."

I cuddled into him, kissing his nose softly in the dark as our hands managed to find each other and entwine.

"I promise I'll figure this out"

"Yeah" he sighed, sheepishly

"I love you" I whispered

"I love you more" he replied, drifting till he was snoring lightly. I couldn't help but smile, as I slowly fell asleep next to him.

I woke up to the sound of vomiting, no Andy next to me. Shit! I slept in Andy's bed.

I ran out to find Andy holding Brooke's hair as she threw up, I ran in and rubbed her back. Andy looked at me concerned.

"What's wrong baby?" I asked her, Andy responded

"I'm guessing the Chinese tofu didn't settle with her well, since that's all that came up."

I frowned.

"I'll go get a glass of water" Andy walked out.

"You got the morning after pill right?"

"Yes, I took it and you know I'm on the pill. I'm not pregnant, it's just the Chinese. I got hungry during the night. Bad idea"

I pouted and kissed her head. Andy rushed back in, passing her the water.

"Drink that, shower and brush your teeth. Then rest in bed. I'll make you some yummy soup okay?" I told her, she nodded, I stroked her blonde hair, she honestly looked like death.

Andy and I went into the lounge, watching TV as Brooke had her shower.

"...she's not pregnant right?" Andy spoke out of nowhere, I shook my head.

"She took the morning after pill, and is on the pill. There's no possible way"

"I think you should still buy a test"

"No way" I laughed, Andy rolled his eyes.

"You are such a pussy" he spat as he got up. I scoffed.

"Why!?"

"Because YOU-you can't just not fucking leave her! You've cheated on her several times! You're marrying her! And now, she's possibly pregnant!" He began to cry again, I felt my throat clench up.

"Don't fucking call me a pussy when you couldn't stand up to your own dad!" I yelled back

Andy huffed and shook his head "fuck you..."

That hit like a stab in the chest.

He grabbed my keys.

"W-Where are you going?"

"To get a pregnancy test for YOUR girlfriend" he pointed at me, I tensed up

Then he walked out and slammed the door, just like that.


	20. Chapter 20

Andy and I sorted shit out, Brooke isn't pregnant so he's less edgy about it now.

We came back inside from a surf to find Brooke rushing around, I was so confused.

"Babe?" I asked as I passed my board to Andy who just minded his own business.

"Yes Shaun?" She asked, frantically grabbing things.

"What are you doing?"

"Last minute trip to Sydney with the girls. I'll be home sunday night" she smiled, kissing my cheek as she shoved the things in the bag.

"You better not have sex with anyone whilst I'm gone" she brought her voice softer

"Ditto" I smirked

"Shaun..."

"You know, if you keep thinking I am, I might. So sh" I grinned, she kissed me quickly.

"I love you"

"I love you too"

She smiled and patted honey goodbye

"Bye Andy!"

"Bye!" He called out from his room, then she was gone, I smirked. Perfect.

I made my way to Andy's room with a beer just as he went to walk out. He smiled.

"What's this for?"

"I'm wondering if you'd like to join for a beer in the bath?" I spoke flirtatiously, causing him to grin as he grabbed the bottle off me.

"How are we both supposed to fit in there?"

I laughed "dude it's a spa bath"

"Oh" he chuckled, I kissed him softly. I was so happy to finally spend time with him.

We got comfy in the spa overflowing with bubbles from a Lush bath bomb. It was so relaxing to just spend some time with Andy.

He sipped his beer and put it on the ledge before coming over to me, placing his head on my chest, I smiled and ran my fingers up and down his back. He was so beautiful.

"This is so nice, I could sleep"

"Yeah I know right" I laughed slightly and closed my eyes, sipping my beer.

"Are we sleeping in my bed tonight?" He asked

"That's your choice. I'd rather yours, none of her stuff would be Laying around"

"Oh true" he laughed, grabbing his beer and taking a sip.

"You're so perfect" I spoke without thought

Andy puffed and smiled his adorable grin.

"Shut up"

I made us toasted sandwiches for dinner and watched batman, still so relaxed, Andy's head resting in my lap, I played with his soft hair. I preferred it to Brooke's hair, I guess. Hers was all long and knotty but Andy's hair was perfect. I don't know, I guess I love him too much.

My phone rang with the caller titled "Work"

Andy paused the movie as I answered.

"Hello?"

"Hey Shaun, Darren here. I was wondering if you could work tomorrow? Felicia's sick"

"Oh.." I looked at Andy, my heart didn't want to leave him, but I needed the money "sure, see you tomorrow"

"Cool. Thank you a heap. Bye"

"Bye" I hung up and sighed

"I have to go into work tomorrow."

"Oh" he frowned

"You can find something to do right?"

"Yeah, I'll catch up with family or something, still haven't done that yet" he laughed.

"Rad, I'm pretty tired though, wanna head to bed?"

Andy nodded, and so we went.

We got into his bed, I rested my head on his chest this time, he played with my hair.

"I wish I could marry you" he whispered, butterflies filled my stomach, but at the same time, agony.

"Yeah same..."

"Have you planned anything for you and Brooke's wedding?" He asked, I groaned and looked at him.

"Seriously? Can you not bring her up...no, no we haven't"

He bit his lip "okay, sorry"

I kissed him tenderly, he sighed into the kiss, my heart exploded as his fingers traced my jaw.

I laid down next to him and closed my eyes. I swear I was going to pass out.

Andy turned off the lamp and cuddled me, I felt so content.

"I love you Shaun" he whispered

"I love you Andy..." I replied

I walked in after work, all the lights were off, which was odd. I greeted Honey and walked into the kitchen area where there were candles lit everywhere, pizza boxes on the coffee table, I smiled wide. What the hell was this. Andy got up from the couch, passing me a wine glass that was filled with beer.

"Hey..." He smiled, kissing my cheek.

"Hey, what's this for?" I asked in shock as I sat down on the couch.

"Well, you spoil me a lot, so I wanted to give back a little." He shrugged and sat next to me, I loosened my tie and opened a pizza box.

"Cheesy crust! Oh Andy, you know how to make my nether quiver"

He giggle and got up as I grabbed a piece, biting right into the crust.

"I also saw this pizza candle today and I had to buy it" he said, showing off this candle that looked like a pizza, I smiled at him.

"You are honestly the best"

"I got us the wedding singer to watch as well" he winked, pressing play on the DVD player. He was so cute

"How was work?" Andy asked with his mouth full

"Long, boring. Uneventful" I laughed "how was seeing your family?"

"Good! Did you know Bradie is married? They're high school sweet hearts apparently. Must've happened after I left"

I almost gasped. I can't believe I never stayed in contact with Bradie. "Britta? Oh my god, I'm so happy for them, they're made for each other"

"Yeah, she's so nice too. My mum got emotional when she saw me" he seemed embarrassed, I sipped my beer.

"Well you should've stayed in contact"

"Yeah, totally regret it now"

After we finished the pizza and the movie came to an end, Andy started cleaning up because Brooke was going to be back tomorrow, I grabbed his hand, he looked down at me on the couch, I smiled lovingly.

"Stop that..." I brought my voice softer

"Kiss me..."

And so he did

He leaned in, our lips touching softly, I slowly stood up, running my fingers through his hair as our lips locked together passionately. He started walking backwards, pulling me with him by my blazer. I sighed as I pressed myself into him, he tripped onto the stairs, me going down with him. We both started laughing.

"Oh my god" I started laughing

"If we were a movie, romantic music would be playing right now" he laughed, I couldn't help but smile into his beautiful blue eyes. He bit his lip and completely removed my tie, wrapping his arms around my neck as our lips smashed together again, getting up and stumbling up the rest of the stairs, Andy pulling off my blazer along the way.

I pushed him against his bedroom door, grabbing his hips as my tongue slid into the kiss, my crotch against his, making him moan.

I pulled away to take off his shirt, Andy feeling around for the door handle. He pushed it open and we walked in, Andy undoing my belt and pants as I undid my shirt.

Andy pulled off his pants and laid on the bed as I got my shirt and pants completely off. He smirked at me as I crawled on top of him. I kissed him slowly before making my way slowly to his neck, looking up at him to see him with his eyes closed, enjoying every second. I grinned and kissed his shoulder, going down to his chest.

"Oh god Shaun..." He exhaled as I slowly thrusted in when we were ready, he wrapped his legs around my hips, my lips gingerly kissing his neck as my hands held onto his back. I started off slow, getting faster slowly. He inhaled, gripping onto my own back.

I kissed him and rolled over, he giggled against my lips as he began to ride me, I instantly threw my head back and moaned loudly, he felt so good on me, I watched his face with absolute pleasure, pulling on my hair as his head flew back, letting out a heartfelt whimper.

"Oh god yes!" He cried as he rode faster, me thrusting up into him. He collapsed, hands both sides of my head holding him up as he yearned and moaned. I panted as I got faster and faster.

"Oh god, oh fuck Shaun!" He cried out, our orgasms almost reaching it's peak.

I rolled him onto his back, our hands entwined as I held them either side of his head, our heads pressed against each other, our eyes melting into each other as I kept going, I couldn't hold it anymore.

"A-ah...o-oh.."

"Yes yesyesyesyes!" Andy screamed, I pushed my head into his neck as I orgasmed with him, shivering as I came, thrusting once more.

"F-FUCK!" Andy yelled as he came. I laughed softly and smiled down at him.

"God I love you..."

"I love you more"

"You keep thinking that"

He giggled and kissed me softly.

we both got up, quickly cleaning up and doing what we had to so there was no evidence. That was when reality struck back, this was all too complicated.

But we ignored that, we ignored that fact and found ourselves again, tangled in his sheets, his sweet smell drifting me into content comfort. I really do love him, and I want nothing more but to stay with him in this bed forever, just as I did 8 years ago...


	21. Chapter 21

I woke up later than usual, which was usually Andy's early. But he wasn't in bed. Odd.

I got clothes on and went downstairs, no one in the house at all, besides Honey, I patted her and gave her some food. I noticed Andy's board was gone, so I guess he was surfing.

I went down to the beach, ignoring the freezing wind against my cheeks because I was too focused, and he wasn't there, I felt like something wrong was going on here.

I walked up my driveway to find Andy standing there, all rugged up in a coat and scarf, which was unusual for Andy.

"Hey, where were you?" I asked worriedly, he shrugged and looked down, I stood still. This wasn't right.

"A-Andy?"

"Me or her, Shaun" he managed to push out. I felt the sudden need to cry. What was happening.

"W-What?"

"Y-You can either stay here with her, or leave to Melbourne with me. Tonight." He told me as the wind pierced through my ear, he began to cry. This was so not Andy.

"Did she set you up to do this?" I asked.

"It's an ultimatum. You have to choose" he sniffed, shifting his backpack.

I stared at him, what the fuck was I to do?

"I-I'll be at the airport at midnight where I'll wait for you till 2am, that's when the flight leaves...I-I'll be going, with or without you, and I won't be coming back"

I felt that tightness crawl up my throat, I let out a sob as I began to cry.

"Andy...I love you" I cried, walking up to him where I cupped his face, he blinked quickly, looking away from my eyes.

"I know I'm in love with you" I breathed

"Then prove it" he sniffed, backing away from me as he walked to what looked like Bradie's car who was in the front seat. I watched them drive away, I felt a dead feeling in my gut, I was almost nauseous.

I walked inside and sat on my staircase, breaking down into my hands. I have no idea what to do

FLASHBACK - this morning

Andy P.O.V

I stretched as I made my way down Shaun's hallway. It was only 9am, earliest I've been up in a while.

I scratched my tummy and yawned, only to stop in shock and see Brooke having breakfast. She was back early.

"Got clothes on?" She asked without looking. I looked down.

"Nope. Be right back" I laughed awkwardly as I ran to my room, getting clothes on quickly and running back. I thought about waking Shaun, but I couldn't do that.

"Good morning" I said cheerfully, pouring myself some juice.

"I know you're fucking my fiancé" she casually said, I felt more awkward than before.

"W-We'll he fucks me but-"

"I don't care Andy" she looked me right in the eyes, I tensed. She was going to murder me. I grabbed my juice and sat on the couch, completely ignoring her as I flipped through channels.

"You're expecting me to make you toast?" She asked

"It's a possibility"

She sighed and did it. I looked over at her in her white blouse and black jeans with all the elegant accessories, she was so pretty. I don't know how Shaun affords to spoil both of us. Kind of felt weird that we were sharing the same dick, too. I love Shaun, but it doesn't hurt that bad because I know he wants me. I know he loves me.

She passed me my toast, I placed it on the coffee table.

"Thank you"

"Yeah whatever"

"What's up with you grumpy pants?"

She put her hands on her hips "are you seriously asking that?"

I shifted my eyes, she went over to the counter and grabbed an envelope before coming back over.

"I need you to give Shaun an ultimatum. Me, or you"

"What? You know I can't do that, why don't you do that?"

"Because he'll get mad and say he isn't in love with you! I need him to either choose me and this life, or move with you to Melbourne and not come back. I'm sick of looking in his eyes and being able to tell he loves someone else"

I just looked at her, what was I supposed to say, she sighed and threw the envelope down. I grabbed it and opened it up. I almost covered my mouth in shock.

"Brooke...you got an abortion? Why? Why didn't you even say you were pregnant?" I asked, she sniffled and sat next to me.

"Because...because I didn't want anything holding Shaun back from being with you, and I didn't want a kid to complicate things, or make it hard for me to live how I want"

I wrapped my arms around her, she hugged me tight and sighed, her overdose of Chanel going right to my head. I felt so bad.

"I'm so sorry..." I whispered

"Doesn't matter Andy, he always loved you." She laughed slightly as she pulled away from me, wiping her eyes.

"I think me and Shaun equally deserve better...promise me you'll do this?" She asked, I nodded and kissed her forehead.

"Yeah, of course"

She smiled at me "you're a good friend"

"I'm not, but I can do this"

She nodded and got up "well I'm heading to my Karissa's...I won't be back till tomorrow"

"Wait, when did you want me to do this?" I asked, she turned and looked at me.

"Tonight. I brought you and Shaun tickets to Melbourne, they're in your room. It's for 2am."

I just stared at her in shock. This was all too much for 10am.

"I believe in you" she smiled positively as she walked out. What the fuck am I supposed to do? What if Shaun doesn't show? This was definitely going to test the both of us..

Shaun P.O.V

I stopped crying after an hour

I knew I loved him, no matter how long we stayed apart. I knew it was always him. And I wasn't going to live a lie any longer, eight years ago, I wouldn't have let this be who I'd become.

I frantically started packing my stuff, texting my boss that I had to go. I didn't care about that job anyway.

I made sure I had everything I needed. Not that I had much. I patted Honey and kissed her head, she licked my chin and I laughed. I was going to miss her so much.

I threw all my stuff into the back seat of my car and drove to my parents, where I stayed for the next few hours. Mum said she'd take me to the airport.

"And this is really what you want?" Mum asked, I assured her.

"Yes mum. When was the last time you saw me truly happy? It was always going to be him..."

"Will we ever see you?" My dad asked, I shrugged.

"Maybe a couple of years, I-I don't know, we'll stay in contact. Let me know when Brooke is happy on her own, then I'll come back"

"Okay" my mum sighed "you're an adult, and if this is what you want, We totally support it"

"Thank you both" I smiled slightly and hugged the both of them

"I love you so much"

Andy P.O.V

I got there at twelve, trying not to get my hopes up. It's Shaun, he'd usually take the easy way out. But I tried not to think about it and waited at the terminal, sat against a wall with my stuff. Was he going to come?

12am soon turned into 12:30am

12:30am soon turned into 1am

By now, I was really freaking out. I was freaking out so much I had to pee four times. I don't know how to feel, or how Shaun will react to the Melbourne life. He might not like it and go back to Sydney. What if he falls out of love with me? I shook away those thoughts, the agonising feeling continued as I saw couple after couple, holding hands, kissing. Being in love.

I love Shaun, I do, but now it's almost 1:30am and I have to get on that plane soon. With or without him.

Without him, I hope this plane manages to crash.

Shaun P.O.V

Mum parked out the front of the airport, I kissed her cheek and told her I loved her before racing inside. I checked my phone, 1:35am. Fuck, any longer at home I wouldn't have made it.

I didn't know where I was going, so I started pacing around for at least 10 minutes until I saw that boy with the blue eyes and shaggy hair stand up. I smiled wide and ran toward him, I almost jumped in his arm as we squeezed each other. We even started to cry.

"Oh god" Andy sniffed, pushing his face into my neck "I was terrified you weren't going to come" he admitted, I pulled away and wiped my eyes.

"I'm sorry, traffic was dreadful and mum drives slow"

Andy grabbed my face and kissed me softly, holding onto my lips always, a second longer. I smiled and looked in his eyes.

"Andy, there was no hesitation in whether who to choose. I've loved you for 8 years, and I'll love you forever more" I whispered, Andy smiled wide and kissed me again.

"Well come on, we've got a plane to catch"

Just making it onto the plane, we took our seats. I was actually pretty excited. This was going to be a new life. This was going to be a great life.


	22. Chapter 22

Moving here was the best thing that ever happened to me. I've been here six months and I've never been happier.

Turns out Andy and Bradie talked and him and the wife were moving down

#stackisback

We were determined on making this happen, I gave Andy the money for university. He really wanted to try again. We packed up his old crappy apartment (and his dog Thor) and moved to a house in St Kilda-a perfect view of the beach and a sunset on a lonely night.

Me and Andy wrote music together, keeping my old lyrics in mind. We often brought up times like how we met, when we kissed, when we'd play playstation until 4am. When Andy wrote on my leg on that stinking day.

But most importantly,

The "I think I'm in love with you"

To the "I know I'm in love with you"

This was everything I wanted, it was like every moment in my life was all meant to come to that moment where I'm standing on my balcony with the boy I fell in love with at the rock show, holding me close and letting me know that no one could ever love me the way he loves me.

And as the years went on, on the 10th anniversary of me and Andy knowing each other, we had a sold out show. We only achieved this with two albums, I was amazed.

I walked out on that stage and looked at the venue filled with people, top to bottom. I smiled at the crowd as we started to play Television. The energy instantly lifted, girls and boys from all around Victoria were jumping and singing the words, knowing that they finally felt like they belonged. Believe me, I knew this was where I belonged. This wasn't something happening in a parallel universe. This was my future. My happy place.

"Wow Melbourne, you guys are so damn sexy" I laughed into the microphone, Andy and I smiled at each other, he seemed nervous. Everyone was screaming.

"It's such an amazing feeling in this building! finally having this work out. My childhood dream has come true and I wouldn't have done it without the help of my boyfriend, my best friend, and you amazing people who really are, the best people I've ever met" I started to ramble, thank god Andy cut me off.

"We really have wanted this for so long and we are so fortunate to have you guys support, we love you so much!"

Everyone screamed, I threw a pick into the crowd.

"Shaun?"

"Yes?" I responded, looking at him, he winked at me.

"Will you..."

I felt my stomach explode with butterflies. The whole room was quiet.

"Be my princess?"

I exploded into a fit of laughter, Bradie did a little badum tsk, everyone laughing and making sounds of awe.

"As long as you're my prince, baby" I giggled before starting the song.

Halfway through the set, I had a sip of water as Andy took his microphone of the stand, walking towards the middle of the stage.

"Did you know what we found out today?" He asked. Oh my god, was he really telling them.

"No!" People shouted, Andy laughed.

"We found out, that Bradie's going to be a daddy!"

Everyone screamed, I laughed and strummed a chord

"He's going to be a DILF now" I giggled.

"And do you know what else is going to happen today and what you're all going to witness?" He asked, I raised my eyebrow as the crowd woo'd some more.

"Shaun?" He turned to me, I laughed in confusion

"No?"

Andy came closer to me, our friend/stagehand quickly came over, taking the bass off him, passing him a little box.

Holy fuck.

"What the hell?" I laughed in disbelief as I watched him get on his knee, flashing cameras everywhere. Andy opened the box to reveal a silver ring.

"Oh my god"

He smiled and grabbed the microphone "Shaun Donald Patrick Diviney...I have waited years to finally get you on a stage where you belong just so I could do this"

I laughed, feeling tears swell in my eyes, my emotions were everywhere.

"ten years ago today, we met at a Blink-182 concert. Look where we are now baby...here I am, on my knee, promising to love and cherish you for infinity. You're my best friend, my band mate, and my boyfriend..and hopefully the one I spend forever with, I always knew I was in love with you, so will you, Shaun Diviney...Marry me?" He asked. I began to cry, covering my mouth as I nodded, he grabbed my hand and slid the ring on, I smiled at him and squeezed him tight.

"I love you so much" I whispered

"I love you Shaun, so so much"

I kissed him softly and he held on, I could feel the happiness just radiating off him.

I pulled away and smiled, trying to contain myself as I spoke into the microphone.

"Well this show is definitely something you'll never forget" I laughed awkwardly

Andy came back on stage with an acoustic guitar. What was he doing now?

"This ones for you Shaun."

I smiled as he started to play a tune, I knew which song this was.

"When we were about 16 or something, I made Shaun a mixtape, and this song, was the one that reminded me of him the most, on our First Date"

he changed the sound of it to this beautiful melody, it was less punk rock and more heartfelt. I was so in love with him. I almost cried three times.

After we finished the show, we hanged around and said hi to fans, many of them congratulating us. I was still so overwhelmed. I was engaged (again) but this time, it felt so right.

We all went out to a restaurant by the beach for dinner to celebrate the engagement, Britta's pregnancy, a sold at show and overall-just a wonderful life.

Finally, by the time we got to our place, I wrapped my arms around him, sighing in content as I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"Long day?" He asked, I chuckled.

"No, I'm just so happy and overwhelmed. I love you so much Andy" I breathed, Andy pulled away and kissed me tenderly, I inhaled, holding him tighter. I pulled away and smirked.

"I'm kind of mad you bet me to it"

"Well now we're going to be youtubes number 1 most watched video"

I laughed and nudged him, grabbing his hand as I led him upstairs.

Too exhausted to do anything, we cuddled in bed, I just admired my ring, it's so beautiful, the black engraving looked like lace. I've come so far in two years. I can't wait to be Shaun Diviney-Clemmensen.


	23. Chapter 23

On the 30th of April 2017, Tyler Gerald Webb was born, Andy and I were now uncles.

We waited in the waiting room from around 4pm till 1:24am when Bradie came out to us

He looked so happy, yet so tired.

"It's a boy!" he cried, Andy and I smiled and got up, hugging him tight.

We stood by Britta's bedside, admiring our, or my soon to be, nephew.

"he's so tiny" I giggled, grabbing his hand. he was so soft and gentle.

"don't worry, he'll shoot up to Bradie's height in no time" Andy commented, laughing as he grabbed my shoulder. Britta tried not to laugh.

"He already looks like him. We're going to have a mini Bradie running around"

"you act like that's a bad thing" Bradie grinned, holding his hands out for his son. I watched as they carefully moved Tyler. Bradie couldn't stop smiling. I was so happy to witness this. They were so perfect together as a little family. I almost felt like crying. I took a deep breath.

"you want this to be us don't you?" Andy whispered in my ear, I smiled and sniffed as I watched Bradie talk to his son.

"yeah...yeah I do" I replied, Andy kissed my back gently.

a few knocks came at the door, a nurse came in.

"Visiting hours are over, unless you are the husband of Britta Webb, you are unable to stay" she told us before walking out. Andy pulled away from me.

We said our goodbyes and headed back to Andy's car. I swear it was 10 degrees outside, Andy put his hoodie over my shoulders, I smiled at him.

"Do you want kids?" I asked as I got into the car, he got in the drivers side and nodded.

"Of course I do. I'm more focussed on marrying you first" he chuckled, I smiled and did my seatbelt.

"talking about weddings, it's only 4 months till we go to LA and get our marriage certificate"

"I know! We've never been there either so it's going to be so much fun to finally go and see all the things I've always wanted to see" he put on his seatbelt and started the car, I agreed with him.

"And then a weekend in Hawaii, god, this will be amazing" I couldn't stop smiling, everything was going right in my life

"I love you Shaun" Andy said so sincerely, looking at me quickly, I held his hand as he drove.

"I love you too Andy"

August 27th 2017.

We signed our papers yesterday, I was so happy to finally be Mr Shaun Diviney-Clemmensen. I know some say marriage is just a piece of paper but I feel like finally we're whole, like finally, after everything, we will stay together forever. No bullshit, just love.

That night we caught a flight to Hawaii, where we were now. We were in LA a week before the signing of the papers, we went to Disneyland, did a lot of shopping, went up to Vegas for a night and did what ever tourist does in LA.

But now, we could relax. Andy got us a beach house right by the sand that was only a few metres from the shore. It was so tropical and was still 25 degrees at night. I felt so great, laying on the cold sand, warm wind blowing gently. I swear I could stay here forever.

"did someone say Tequilla on the beach?" Andy hyped as he ran over from our deck, passing me the bottle of top shelf mexican liqour, he sat next to me "love your shorts by the way" he commented on my American flag shorts that I brought at Walmart

"they were only like, 3 bucks"

"I know" he laughed, kissing my cheek before he poured us two shots, I instantly shot it down, exhaling from the smooth yet burning texture.

"good right?"

"A plus"

Andy smirked and did another shot, I smirked at him

"hey, what's a mexicans favourite book?" I asked

"what?"

I chuckled "how Tequilla mocking bird!"

Me and Andy both started to piss ourselves laughing.

"god, how did I get so lucky?" he asked, I scratched my lip and kissed his cheek

"we should really thank Travis, Tom and Mark for all that they've done"

"yeah, tell them how lucky I am to have such a hot husband" he flirted, pushing me down as he crawled on top of me, I got butterflies at the word 'husband'. I laughed and looked up at him, running my fingers slowly along his jaw.

"I love you..." I whispered

"I know" he whispered back with a smirk, leaning in, our lips colliding with force, slow but passionate as we motioned against each others' lips. I sighed and ran my other hand up his shirt, gripping onto his back, Andy pushed down on my crotch, exhaling as he softly bit my bottom lip, letting my soft moan escape.

"want to take this indside?" he asked with a cheeky laugh, I grinned.

"definitely"

Andy put the alcohol down on the bed side table as we undressed each other, I kissed down his chest slowly, getting on my knees to remove his last bit of clothing-his underwear.

I then took him into my mouth, he instantly moaned as I gave him all I could.

"Shaun...fuck!" he moaned. I sucked hard and pulled away with a smirk, I got back up and pushed him down on the bed, getting on top of him, he leaned up so our lips could crash together, moving to the sound of the ocean, constantly crashing into the shore. He rolled me onto my back, I smirked under his lips before our tongues began to touch softly, only tasting each other. Andy grabbed he lube and condom he put by the bed earlier and got me ready, I watched him as he sat down on my dick, a moan exiting his lips.

"fuck yes..."

I grabbed his hips, watching him move like I've never seen him before-there's a reason why he calls himself a great dancer. He knows how to move his hips. I leaned up and bit his neck, kissing it slowly with my tongue, he gasped as i pushed myself up into him, forcing myself deeper. He gripped onto the nape of my neck as he moaned louder and louder, just as I began to pant, slamming into him. Hard.

"Shaun! oh god" he cried, i rolled him onto his back, he gripped onto the head of the bed as i thrusted faster, my hands over his, our eyes getting lost in each other as each thrust soon became bliss.

"fuck that feels so good Shaun, dont stop" he yearned, whimpering as he shut his eyes, I grabbed his length, pumping him fast as we both felt it crawling up our throats. A wild orgasm lept out of Andy. He threw himself up, clinging onto me as i did to him, shivering as I moaned his name softly. He was so beautiful.

"you are so beautiful" I whispered as Andy collapsed onto the pillow. I pulled out and fell next to him, kissing his shoulder softly, he smiled at me.

"I am so in love with you Shaun..." he breathed, I laughed and pressed my head to his.

"good, you have no choice now. We're married, Mr Andy Diviney"

"it's Diviney hyphen Clemmensen"

"whatever" I whispered before I got up.

I came back to bed five minutes later to find Andy asleep, I put my glass of water down and snuggled besides him, pulling the sheets over us. He snored softly and I just giggled, kissing his nose softly.

"just so you know, I am so madly in love with you, too..."


	24. Chapter 24

After 3 nights in Hawaii, we headed to Sydney to see our family. Apparently they wanted to meet us at the Hall where we first met. Which was odd, we thought. They also told us to wear our suits?

We walked down the street that it was on, hand in hand. Like we did all those years ago. When I fell in love with the boy at the rock show.

"holy fuck" Andy murmured as we reached it, a sign read 'Andy and Shaun wedding reception this way' pointing to the door. I couldn't stop smiling. What the fuck was going on.

"I can't believe they did this" I laughed, opening the door slowly, Andy's baby brother and sister threw flower petals on us, we both couldn't stop smiling. It looked so weird, the room was so open, white with creams and blues and everyone we knew was there, even some of our fans. Best part was, the mixtape Andy made for me was softly playing in the background. Our soundtrack.

My mum and Andy's mum came over together and grabbed our hands.

"welcome home boys" my mum smiled, leading us onto the stage where there was the main table, we took our seats that were labelled 'Mr and Mr'. A waitor came out and started serving everyone pizza. I almost couldn't contain my laughter. It was perfect, Andy dug right into it.

I grabbed the microphone that Andy's mum passed me.

"I have a question, what is this all for?" I asked, she took the microphone off me.

"we missed out on the wedding, so we thought that it'd be great to have the reception, not only that but have it here, where you boys first met" she smiled, passing it back to me. Andy froze as I noticed where his eyes were looking towards. His father, nicely dressed in a suit and tie, watching from behind. Andy stood up, I grabbed his hand, his lip trembled a bit before looking at his mum.

"why is dad here?" he asked, embarrassed

"he's your father Andy..." His mum replied

he sighed, I passed him the microphone. He almost snatched it.

"Hey everyone, thank you so much for doing this, I really, really could not be more happy with the people in my life."

I watched John start to leave, Andy moved away from his seat and went towards the very front of the stage.

"dad wait!"

everyone's eyes averted onto his father, he almost looked like he was crying. I couldn't tell.

"Dad, I want you to stay, I want you to be here for this moment. Please" Andy's voice croaked.

"I know, I may have failed you in the past, fuck, I failed school and university-I was so afraid of coming home to you dad because I was living, ha, failing a dream you wanted...but I hope you're damn proud because I-I" he stopped, taking a breath, I stood up. He can't do this.

"Because I am so damn proud of myself dad...I am so glad I failed Uni, you know why? because it led me back to Shaun, what I was missing for the past 8 years came back into my life, because of him, we moved to St Kilda, I went back to university, I started a band that has saved not only us, but hundreds of kids all around Australia! And now, I'm married at 30 to this wonderful man that I couldn't imagine living another day without... I may be the most worthless, shittiest son you will ever have, b-but I hope with what I've done in the past 12 years has made you proud...I-I hope you're proud" he sniffed, everyone clapped for some reason, John walked into the middle of the room. I sat back down as I watched Andy jump off the stage, running to his dad where they embraced in a tight hug.

"I am so damn proud of you, boy" he said with so much compassion into the microphone. I smiled wide and clapped along with everyone else.

Andy laughed and pulled away, wiping his tears.

"anyway, let the party begin"

After a whole load of eating, dancing and cutting the delicious Red Velvet cake, we all went back to our tables as now was the part where we, and our family could say a few words. I was shitting myself, where would I begin.

Andy wrapped his arm around my shoulder as my mum stood up first

"Shaun, you have turned into such an amazing man. I-I will always remember when we lived in newcastle and you thought you had no future, I told you to reach for the stars, a-and you've done more than that. You created a new sun. I am so thankful for Andy walking into your life. I still remember walking into your room and you told me you had never felt this way about anyone before, and I could see in your eyes, that he really was everything you wanted. I still laugh at that time you two were conoodling in my lounge-yes boys, we knew, I found it beautiful though. Young love is something that should be held onto, and you boys never let that go. I am so proud and happy for you both. Congratulations" my mum smiled, clapping with everyone. Her and I both started crying, I leant my hand over and held it, smiling. "I love you mum"

next up was my dad. I could already feel the embarrassment.

"unlike my wife here" he began, I already started to tense up "I thought there was no way he loved that boy from Gorokan with that shaggy blonde hair and skinny as a stick legs. I even convinced myself it was a phase at one point...But one night, I walked into the lounge at around 2am, one of those old romance movies played on the tv and they were asleep. Andy holding my son as he slept in his arms and Andy smiled at me and said 'I love him'. That's when I knew that it wasn't a phase, these two didn't care about rules, gender or any of the faults that came with it. They loved each other and that's when I truly knew, Shaun, my son, was going to marry the hottest bisexual in the central coast" he laughed, as did everyone else

"but anyway, here's my toast to Shaun and Andy. My your lives be filled with nothing but happiness, even after the life is well lived." he smiled, sipping his beer, I clapped with everyone. For my dad, that wasn't too bad.

Then Andy's mum and Gerald stood up

"we don't want to bore you all with a speech" his mum started "but we just want to say that we are so, so thankful that Shaun came back into Andy's life when he did, when Andy showed up after not keeping in contact for the last 5 years, he looked so happy. He told me what was going on and said 'mum don't worry, don't worry. Everything's good. I have Shaun back. I'm going to marry him' and he was so persistant of that! and he's achieved it"

I looked at Andy with a loving gaze, he really did love me.

Gerald took the microphone "now, I may not be your father, but I am so proud to call you my step-son. I knew you'd always do good, and when you brought Shaun home, I could tell just by the aura you two had together, that this was something that would never die out. I wish you both all the best."

last was Bradie and Britta who sat at the end of the table with Tyler. Bradie stood up and looked over at us.

"You two-" he sighed "oh man you two...Andy, you are honestly the best brother I could ask for, despite that time you forgot my birthday BUT, I forgive you" he laughed "you are the best brother, and Shaun is the best man you'll ever have. I'm so thankful you brought him home because he easily became one of the bestest friends I had ever had and being in a band with you two and being able to witness the amazing chemistry-and as my dad said, the amazing aura you two bring is just beautiful, and it really is inspiring and helps me be a better husband for my own wife"

I may have aw'd

Britta took the microphone "and because of your amazing ups and downs and that inspiration, We want to give to you as much as you have given to us. So, we've decided that whenever you two are ready to have a child, I will more than happily be the surrogate of my niece or nephew" She smiled, everyone woo'd, Andy and I couldn't stop smiling.

"are you for real?" I yelled, she laughed "yes"

Andy got up and went and gave his brother a hug, I followed and did the same, kissing Britta on the cheek.

"thank you. My god, thank you"

I took the microphone next as we moved back to our seats.

"Thank you all for doing this and coming to celebrate this moment in my life. I'm almost speechless, I love you all so much..." I smiled at everyone and looked at Andy "Andy, you..." I huffed and shook my head "you are the biggest idiot I know and I am so in love with you. I can't believe you felt the same, I honestly still can't believe we're married. I'm so happy you're the one I get to spend my life with, forever you and me looking in each others' blue eyes in the moonlight. I love you and I will protect you, and stand by you till the end of time" I smiled trying not to cry the happy tears swelling in my eyes, Andy smiled wide, kissing me softly before taking the microphone off me.

"Shaun, you are the most amazing man I have ever met. I don't believe in much but I can't help but think fate, destiny, brought us together, time and time again-first time, to this venue, where we were meant to be. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you. This is step one to a lifetime of happiness and possibilities. I still remember when I used to say 'I think I'm in love with with you' and you told me that we barely knew each other so I said 'I'll keep saying that I think I'm in love with you till I know I'm in love with you' and being the cool kid I was, i thought it was pretty romantic" he chuckled, as did I and everyone else, he stared at me lovingly "and it instantly became a thing and when I told you I was in love with you, it was magical and has continued to be in every single way..man, fuck-Shaun, I am so in love with you and am more than proud to be your husband"

I jumped up, filled with butterflies, squeezing him "I love you so much.." I grabbed the mic "how dare you outdo my speech" we chuckled, kissing softly as everyone clapped. How was it possible to be so happy and still so in love?

After that, everyone kept partying, Andy and I slow danced a few times, I couldn't believe how lucky I was.

Andy's dad left quickly after the speech's though, but Andy was happy he could finally make some sort of peace with his dad, as was I.

Our parents got us the honeymoon suite at the Hilton where we crashed. We cuddled under the sheets and looked out the window onto the beautiful city of Sydney.

"can you believe we're really married?" Andy asked

"no" I laughed, running my fingers up and down his arm "and I can't believe Britta wants to carry our baby"

"I know it's like, everything we have ever wanted is finally starting to go where it belongs"

I looked into Andy's eyes softly. I was actually so tired.

"I love you..."

"I love you too" he smiled, kissing me gently before we both cuddled up, closing our eyes where we finally, finally, got to sleep.


	25. Chapter 25

We went to the airport after staying a few nights, I didn't know how to feel, honestly. How was everything going to be once we get back to our normal lives and with when we start considering the possibility of a baby. It's so exciting but makes me nervous, a good kind, though.

Andy came and sat next to me, passing me my McDonalds, I immediately started eating, as did he.

Just as I was about to finish my burger, I almost choked at what I saw from my blue plastic seat-it was Brooke and she was a little girl and a man, buff, tan. Good looking for an apparent straight dude. But I was mentally running.

"You not going to finish that?"

"suddenly not hungry" I admitted, nodding in her direction. Andy looked over and I swear I saw his jaw drop, even the tiniest bit.

"what the fuck?"

"should we say hi?" I asked, Andy bit his lip "I don't know-"

"come on, if we find out shes completely over it, then we'll be able to live both here and in Melbourne"

Andy sighed as I got up, what was the big deal, really? It was ages ago now.

Andy grabbed my arm, I turned around, his gaze caught my breath.

"you wanna know why we can't go over there? because she told me to give you that ultimatum...She told me to bring you to Melbourne and never come back"

I stared at him

"Shaun, she got an abortion when you were together, without your consent or you knowing"

I felt my gut drop lower.

"w-what?" my voice ached

"everyday, I think about how the fact you two didn't have that child was because I got inbetween it-" I shook my head

"shut up, it was never you"

"that's what I mean. I feel like she wanted you gone, now that I look back at it. She wanted us gone, and if that girl in her arm is her daughter, that means that she got with that guy whilst you two were together..."

I almost felt nauseous, so I took a seat. Andy got in his knees, looking up in my eyes as he held my hands.

"Shaun, she's more than over you...she twisted you just as much as you twisted her"

"I don't care, I-I'm mad that she never-that she lied, about being pregnant"

"she said she wanted nothing to hold you back"

"bullshit. I would've loved that child and still would've married you. I love you, not her" I sniffed

Andy smiled slightly "we'll have our own children, and you'll love them so much more... So, if you want to say hi, I will take you over there. But don't let her play the victim"

I nodded and licked my lips, standing up, almost storming towards her, Andy following.

"Brooke!" I spoke enthusiastically, she turned around and had the same look Andy had when he noticed her.

"S-Shaun! hey, how's things? you randomly dissappeared-"

"shut up Brooke, he knows" Andy spoke bluntly, she sighed. I ignored that and said hi to the brunette child in her arm.

"hey, what's your name?"

"it's Chloe" Brooke smiled at me, I laughed "oh right, nice and original" I was sarcastic, obviously

"she yours?" I asked, she nodded

"she'll be two in a couple months"

"oh wow! that's amazing. Where are you guys going?" I asked

"oh, uh Perth. Chloe's dad, Lucas-he's over there by the coffee stand but um, his family lives there so we're visiting. where are you guys going?"

"back home to melbourne" I smiled at her, beginning to boast "We just got married in LA about two weeks ago, it was so romantic, and when he proposed to me on stage in front of thousands of people I just couldn't believe how lucky I was-" I could hear Andy snickering from behind me "oh-"

"then our parents wanted to come here so we came for a visit and they threw a surprise reception at the venue where we met. It was really beautiful, really"

"aw, that's so nice" she fake smiled, 'Lucas' came over and looked at us funny.

"babe, we gotta go, flight in 10"

"okay well-it was nice seeing you guys" she bit her lip, I could almost read her thoughts through her eyes. She seemed envious, as if she was hoping i'd turn back to her. No way, what do we have besides beauty? nothing.

Andy and I quickly boarded our flight, I held his hand as it took off, I rested my head on his shoulder. he kissed my head.

"you okay bub?"

I nodded "I'm perfect" I smiled, looking up at him "I'm so happy, I can't wait to get home to Thor and work on music and just-live, how we should"

"you're a doofus" he laughed, kissing me quickly before he looked out the window "weeee clouds"

I laughed and kissed his shoulder

"you are the biggest idiot, I love you"

"I love you too" he smirked, kissing me again, both of us holding onto it a moment longer this time.

We picked up Thor and headed straight home, I've adopted him by this point. He was the best little dog. He made himself at home as Andy came running downstairs with our surfboards in only his shorts.

"how about a quick surf before the sun sets?"

"sounds good to me"

After the surf, we relaxed on our boards, watching the sunset.

"How are we just constantly happy?"

"it's kind of like farts" Andy blurted, I went into a fit of laughter "what?!"

"you cant really hold back farts, but when they happen, you gotta admit, it's satisfying"

"Andy!" I laughed "see, this is why I married you"

"you had no choice, let's be honest here" he smirked

"I didn't want another choice"

Andy blushed, I giggled and pushed him off his board. Next minute, he grabbed my board flipping me off. I bopped up, taking a breath and wiping my face. Andy grabbed my face, kissing my gently, i kissed back slowly, despite the wet salty taste. I couldn't deny that when he kisses me I feel so alive. He whispered he loved me and I fell, somehow deeper, letting him know that I love him too.


	26. Chapter 26: Epilogue

After all our stuggles, we made it through. Our albums were popular and we had more publicity-which I really didn't care about because the fans are my everything, third to my family and the band. They built the foundation that kept it together, they tell me that they wouldn't be where they were without me and I simply tell them, that I wouldn't be where I was without them.

Amelia Renee Diviney-Clemmensen was born in 23rd of December 2018, healthy with bright blue eyes and blonde hair. What a Sweet December that was.

Andy and I loved her unconditionally and moved back to Sydney just before she turned 5 so we could raise her with the help of her grandparents and would stop Bradie having to go back and forth to Sydney and Melbourne, so he got more time with Tyler and their little girl Delilah-Rae. Andy was such a good dad, the way he protected her so passionately was heartwarming, I'm so happy with our life. It's everything I've ever wanted in a family, and they're all I wanted. Along with Thor, of course

I often believe the thing with John happened for a reason, it tesed our love, our boundries, and when he walked back into my life (or stumbled) I honestly believe that that's how it was meant to be, Andy thinks different, but I told him, I tell him that if it weren't for that, our love wouldn't be so strong.

By the time Amelia was 16 and had her own life, she picked up on our skills and gained such a love for music and animals, wanting to becoming a Vet. So when she was 18, we saved up the money so she would be able to go to university (she even fell in love with an art major named Anthony). We are so unbelievably proud of our daughter with her light Brown hair and bright blue eyes. She was beautiful, elegant and the best daughter anyone could have.

Years raced by so fast, and each day stood still, almost hazy, because I still had Andy, and that's what mattered. Now with a grandchild on the way, we were more than estatic.

Despite our age, we stayed forever young, we were still playing shows, making music with all our passion (no passion left the bedroom either, let me tell you)

And now, with nothing but at least 20 years left ahead of us, we smiled at each other in content in our cottage by a lake, where we were all alone. Andy'd take me on the boat to the middle of the lake every sunday. He'd hold my hands, maybe play me a song, and most importantly, he told me with each day that grew closer that he always knew he was in love with me, so madly and deeply, he loves me, he really loves me and he will never stop loving me.

And still with one soft kiss, always holding on a second longer...he took my breath away...

That's our Happily Ever After...


End file.
